[jimbo2012]

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

7. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

8. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

9. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

10.. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

11.. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

And last... but not least:
12. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.



...To test this theory...

...Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour...

...Then open it and see who's happy to see you...

[senior citizen]

Originally Posted by jimbo2012

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

7. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

8. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

9. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

10.. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

11.. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

And last... but not least:
12. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.



...To test this theory...

...Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour...

...Then open it and see who's happy to see you...

This is just as bad....maybe even worse. So, forgive me....
Couldn't resist............"don't shoot the messenger".....


1. A dog is always willing to listen to you—without trying to solve all your problems.

2. Dogs will eat anything you give them—happily and without complaining.

3. Dogs don’t have mothers-in-law who find fault with everything you do (or don’t do) for their "precious boy."


4. A dog will never ask if he can buy a boat.

5. Dogs do not spend 5 hours playing golf.

6. Dogs are happy to watch romantic comedies, rather than football.


7. Dogs are loyal. Even if they hump your best friend’s leg, they will do it in front of you and not try to go home with her.

8. Dogs will never complain about how much you spend on personal grooming.

9. A dog will never contradict you in front of your child or give you small appliances for your birthday or Christmas.


10. A dog will never use all the hot water and leave soppy towels on the bathroom floor.

11. Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

12. A dog will kiss you when you are crying your eyes out—not accuse you of being "manipulative."

13. A dog does not believe he can fix anything just because he has a Y chromosome. His manhood will not be threatened when you call a plumber.


And last, but not least:

I4. You can neuter a dog anytime you want.

[Parker]

Y'all are too funny!

[Schaumburger]

Originally Posted by Parker

Y'all are too funny!

Put a smile on my face this morning.

[elizabeth52]

Wow, now these are funny!

[Dr Winston O Boogie jr]

Wow!!! You read these and wonder why we just don't all have dogs instead of husbands and wives...Oh wait..........

[2BNTV]

There was a talk show that answer pets questions concerning their health and the host ended every conversation with:

Who do like better, your dog or your spouse?

Hmmmmmmmmmmm........

[Golfingnut]

What chu takin bout Willis?

[DougB]

Your dog is barking at the back door... Your wife is barking at the front door.... Who do you let in? ..........It's your call, but the dog will stop barking as soon as you let him in.