The Benefits of Walking

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Old 01-25-2016, 09:50 AM
chuck90199's Avatar
chuck90199 chuck90199 is offline
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Default The Benefits of Walking

Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you, at 85 years old, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

My grandpa started walking
Five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
And we don't know where he is.

I like long walks,
Especially when they are taken
By people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking
Is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning,
Before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

I joined a health club last year,
Spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise,'
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

The advantage of exercising every day
Is so when you die, they'll say,
“Well, he looks good doesn't he.”

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
Start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise
The last few years,
Just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older,
Because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much
About how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
And by the time I leave,
I look just fine.
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Old 01-25-2016, 10:45 AM
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Dr Winston O Boogie jr Dr Winston O Boogie jr is offline
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I wish I could walk more. A few years ago I shattered the calcaneus (heel bone) of my left foot. It's held together with seven titanium screws. It gets very painful if I walk more then a few hundred yards.

Any suggestions for alternatives to walking? I ride my bike quite often but lately the wind is very cold.
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