[Skip2MySue]

The Italian Elbow




An Italian grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife.






“You comma to de front door of the apartmenta. I am inna apartmenta 301.






There issa bigga panel at the front door. With you elbow, pusha button 301.






I will buzza you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right.






Get in, and with you elbow , pusha 3.






When you get out, I’mma on the left. With you elbow, hit my doorbell.”;






“Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow ?






“What... You coming empty handed ?"






__________________________________________________ ________







Wise Italian Grandfather






Why Italian Fathers and Grandfathers pass their handguns down through the family.






An old Italian man is dying.






He calls his grandson to his bedside, Guido, I wan’ you lissina me.






I wan’ you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me.”;






“But grandpa, I really don’t like guns... How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?”;






“You lissina me, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife,






lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. ”;






“Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man.






“Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, ‘Times up’ “?

[Schaumburger]

[bkcunningham1]

Point your watch and say times up. LOL Good ones.

[Barefoot]

Originally Posted by Skip2MySue

The Italian Elbow

Loves your jokes, thanks for the laugh.

[thistrucksforyou]

I liked the Grandma one, sounds like what my grandma would have said !