might think this is the dawning of the age of Aquarius................

oh sorry.

Gracie was looking spitefully at the Cool Bun club standing outside the theater, since it had been a few years since Gracie's buns looked really Cool. The Cool Bun Club was made up of a bunch of..........

...Red Hat Ladies with too much flowing hair for their many outings. So, they had to put it up into very tightly wound buns often causing them to blurt out mean things to bystanders because of their migraines. Many of the Villagers had caught The Cool Bun Club's barbs. Or, is that Bobs? Barb1191 often complained....

......"its time for a change."

CHAPTER II

It was a whole new day in The Villages and a new year! Everyone was planning ahead and making new years resolutions. Some of the people and their resolutions were as follows: First to step up and make a resolution was.....

Villages PL. He decided that 2013 was the year that he would add a little meat to his diet. He was going to have standing rib roast with root vegetables and some nice Chicken with dressing and a little Pork and sauerkraut.

This shocked everyone, especially the Cool Bun ladies. They didn't think this would EVER happen, but Villages PL was only kidding. He was going to have a lovely roasted parsnip for dinner and then go to the meeting at the Savannah Club that Jimbo was going to speak at.

Gracie noticed that she had just dangled a participle. She was so embarrassed that she .............................

:1rotfl: ...... TOTV women who wore their hair in a bun, (not to be confused with crossed buns), that Gracie bakes and are so delicious but I digress. The women was led by Pturner was really the girls posse in disguise and she was going to lead them on a ........

shopping adventure. They were all going to go to...........

Walmart's to buy up all the...........

...dinkleberry cat treats for Gracie's kitties! But when they got there...

.....hair care products, baked goods, diet books and other such items. Reading diet books makes them hungry so they......

...all that was left for the kitties were scissors for removing the cats' dingleberries. "We will have to go to...." said PTurner.

Boy Howdy's. They have a new singer there and she sings nothing but...............

sews. Is that so? asked Pooh. Now, I'm all confused. What where we talking about asked......

Suzie sews seashell shells by the South Sea shore.
 

....RichieLion. "This is the only sew music I know about," he grimaced. "It is for sewing". Julie Rose Sews: music to sew by. "You sew?" asks Tal. "I tried knitting but it looked like something my cat threw up when I was done. A hairball."

"At least, you have a cat." said Syndey. "Last week my beloved Siamese left us for the block TomCat.

TomCat because the cat leaps over couches a great deal and will not take its medicine."

"Enough of this" says DaleMN. "Where were we??"

Lala Land was the reply; the garden of weedom! Everybody laughed and....

On the tenth Day of Christmas....
 

...there were ten Jack Lord imitators a leapin' about Hawaii Five 0. This was around Lake Sumter Square where Graciegirl was still giving the Cool Bun Club members the evil eye because....

On the tenth day of Christmas... - YouTube -- London Chorus.

see was watching them smoke and Gracie had quit and knows the benefits of being smoke free. The Cool Bun Club members blew smoke in Gracie's face and a fight broke out amonst it's membership as some felt that was being disrespectful so the police came and..........

told them to knock it off, did an Irish Jig then left! Everybody just stood there stunned because of....

..boy could they dance. The Sumter County Sheriff's deputies should be on X Factor where they could show Simon Cowell and others how to really dance the Irish Jig. KathieI started dancing and....

everyone followed her lead as she isn't The Mayor for nothing. KathieI went off to make arrangements for the Crispers get together on the third Friday of the month. Normally, she is there to take pictures, hand out badges and be the welcoming committe all rolled up in one. Mike and Nancy volunteered to host Crispers for her and.......

....pay for KathieI's drink and food. The other TOTVers have to fend for themselves this month. Samhass decided to arrange another Villages Freeze at Crispers with all the attendees dressed up as Dead Presidents. Skyguy came as....

U.S Grant complete with a drink in his hand. he wanted to be in character, 2B wanted to come as Lincoln but he is height challenged so he asked Bill of Bill-n-Brillo who is tall and was a majestic figure. Lincoln told everyone that popcorn was popular back in the sixties errrr 1860, and then wanted to give a speech but was interrupted by Grant because........

...Grant was quite drunk as he had no war to plan. Truman that tough-as-nails practical President came into the room. Graciegirl was in fine character as FDR's successor even if it meant a little cross-dressing. 2B came as the remarkable Garfield who was a huge loss to the country. RichieLion played Reagan of course. Nixon came stomping in and....

starting cussing up a storm when Gracie interrupted him by saying, "that's not very presidential". Nixon stopped as per Gracie's admonishment, (she wasn't a schoolteacher for nothing), and FDR chimed in that it was time for coctails. They had a ouple of drinks that was to be followed with dinner. It's a good thing that everyone was not hungry as the cook in FDR's White House was known to be terrible and serve food that was barely edible so the group........

...was directed by the Morses to their special dining section of Red Sauce-- beyond the green door and upstairs---where they could get dishes sent over from any restaurant in the Villages. Nixon wanted to tape the whole affair for posterity but....

No one was interested in Nixon's posterity. There was one bag of popcorn and Gracie asked who wants it 2b or not 2b........

...that is the question. Horatio. I digress. Kennedy started hitting on all the waitresses; while FDR was trying to unionize them. In came Teddy Roosevelt saying "Bully!" and....

tried yet again to take US Grant's drink away from him. But Grant kept insisting he was sober saying "I'mm knot srunk, no surree, no knot mee!" But Fumer, who happened to be watching, jumped in and...

asked Grant if he thought was room was turning on it's axis. Grant said axis, that's a different war. FDR said that's my war and proceeded to tell stories that enraptured the audience. Fumar then drove Grant home in his car, (Grant didn't notice he was in a car as he passed out), and the rest of the presidents.........

picked Grant up, put him back in his tomb and they all danced the Irish Jig on top of the tomb! Meanwhile, back on the farm....

On the Eleventh Day of Christmas-- 11 pipers piping.
 

...some of the pipes had burst from all the party favors stupidly flushed down the toilets by a drunken reveller. Eleven pipers arrived and began fixing the plumbing when....

an alligator started coming out of the toilet. Everybody panicked and ran out the door. Figmo Bohica was coming down the street to see what all the commotion was about and had his firearm with him. They wanted him to shoot the alligator but being a responsible gun owner he ..........

...said that one's too small for my wall so I am not going to shoot it. That famous dog (Westie) rescuer from the Villages-- TOTV's own GatorGus-- offered to wrestle it and put it in a pond when.....

The alligator went through the cack door to the pond. after all ghat excitement, all the pipers decided to go to Evans Prairie for a couple of drinks to relax. While waiting at a table, the waitress......

started to bump and grind and the manager ran over and yelled at her that this is NOT this kind of play, then fired her. Eventually....

...the waitress bought up Speckled Butterbean's old spot --after working at Ocala's Body Shots for a few years-- and created a 4 star restaurant that put Evans Prairie to shame. She even has a tradition of bringing in eleven Scottish bagpipers piping on January 4.

Back to our plumber pipers and the gator. GatorGus has rescued the gator and got it into Lake Sumter with the help of the eleven pipers. But, his dog Bounce, seeking revenge on gators....

did something about there being no P in Lake Sumter! :evil6: Spectators gasped and...

...were amazed at the amount of pee one West Highlands Scottish Terrier had. He kept peeing and peeing and peeing for a solid minute. Bounce also must have drunk something that disturbed the gators as only the brown snouted remote contolled gator remained anywhere near the Lake Sumter docks.

The fishers rejoiced as now they had a good shot at the bigger fish and did not have to worry about the gators.


Bounce even got an ice cream cone from Haagen Daz from GatorGus who also gave him a John 3:16 dog collar to show his victory over the gators by honoring that most famous Gator Tim Tebow. TimTebow.com | The Official Website of Tim Tebow Tebow's father was in town and....

was wearing a Mark Sanchez jersey but the coach had him beat him with a tatoo of his wife in nothing but a Sanchez jersey. That was the headline in the NY Daily News, (you can't make this stuff up folks, it's true). The coach then fled from the paparazzi who were clicking pictures at a rapid rate and the coach fell into the pool trying to get away and.........

Sunbathing Rex Ryan spotted, tattoo of wife's likeness wearing only Mark Sanchez NY Jets jersey on display in Bahamas - NY Daily News

...Bounce jumped in to save him as Steve (GatorGus) was busy visiting with Samhass. Bounce does a great dog paddle. The Jets' coach Rex Ryan managed to grab onto Bounce's John 3:16 dog collar's tag as that is all that stood out from the huge inner tube Bounce had around himself. Bounce got Ryan to the side of the pool and....

....gave him mouth to mouth respiration. That made the coach very.....