[Talk Host]

I would like some opinions on an argu.. ah discussion that my wife and I are having. Let's see if I can explain this.

In a restaurant for dinner. There are two, three or four couples. As the pre-order discussion is had, it's said by someone (let's say me) "is anybody going to order an appetizer." Then all in attendance say "no."

Then I say, (example at BoneFish Grill) "I am going to have an order of the Bang Bang Shrimp" (which I love. That's the only thing there I really like)

Then, MY appetizer arrives, my wife thinks it's proper to share it around the table. I say it isn't.

Recently, six people, I was the only one to order a calamari appetizer. When it came, it got shared around the table, and by the time it got back to me, there were two little pieces left.

My position is that if they want something, they should order it. My wife's position is "what are you going to do, sit there and eat it in front of everybody without offering it?"

JLK

[Russ_Boston]

No brainer - who cares what the dish is called. If you are ordering it as your main meal then why would anyone consider it appropriate to share with you? We, quite often, order apps instead of entrees.

[Bill-n-Brillo]

TH - I'll side with your perspective, without question.

Bill

[herbaru]

Originally Posted by Talk Host

I would like some opinions on an argu.. ah discussion that my wife and I are having. Let's see if I can explain this.

In a restaurant for dinner. There are two, three or four couples. As the pre-order discussion is had, it's said by someone (let's say me) "is anybody going to order an appetizer." Then all in attendance say "no."

Then I say, (example at BoneFish Grill) "I am going to have an order of the Bang Bang Shrimp" (which I love. That's the only thing there I really like)

Then, MY appetizer arrives, my wife thinks it's proper to share it around the table. I say it isn't.

Recently, six people, I was the only one to order a calamari appetizer. When it came, it got shared around the table, and by the time it got back to me, there were two little pieces left.

My position is that if they want something, they should order it. My wife's position is "what are you going to do, sit there and eat it in front of everybody without offering it?"

JLK

How about asking "Is anybody interested in sharing an appetizer with me?" When they say no, than I see no need to pass.

[Talk Host]

Now, one clarification. I am talking about a true appetizer here. Not an entree. A dish ordered before the main course.. In this situation, we all have ordered an entree other than my appetizer.

[redwitch]

Quite honestly, I'd be pretty ticked off if the others had said no to ordering one and then ate mine. However, I wouldn't want to just sit and eat in front of them, so I would offer to share. If they took me up on it, the next time I dined with this group, I'd simply state that it is their turn to order the appetizer, not simply ask if they wanted on. If the appetizer was going to be my main meal, I'd request the server bring it with the other dinners.

[Russ_Boston]

Originally Posted by Talk Host

Now, one clarification. I am talking about a true appetizer here. Not an entree. A dish ordered before the main course.. In this situation, we all have ordered an entree other than my appetizer.

OH - a little different I think.

If I had said no to an app I wouldn't take any but if I had ordered one I'd offer (hoping no one would take any)

[chuckinca]

An appetizer is meant to be shared - I would share it

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[tpop1]

Originally Posted by Talk Host

In a restaurant for dinner. There are two, three or four couples. As the pre-order discussion is had, it's said by someone (let's say me) "is anybody going to order an appetizer." Then all in attendance say "no."

Then I say, (example at BoneFish Grill) "I am going to have an order of the Bang Bang Shrimp" (which I love. That's the only thing there I really like)

JLK

In MHO the offer was made and declined!

No need at that point to share; except the wife tells you to...married 39 years and haven't won one like this yet.

Next time order a couple for the table!

[sunday]

I agree with Chuck.
Although I certainly empathize with the poster...
I personally never order an appetizer that I don't expect to share, regardless.
Come to think of it...nor do I dine with anyone that I do not have full intent on treating anyway.

[Talk Host]

Originally Posted by sunday;316***

Come to think of it...nor do I dine with anyone that I do not have full intent on treating anyway.

Must be nice. Please invite me out frequently.

[Jane52]

I agree with TH. If they have been asked if they want to order an appetizer together with you and they said "no", then they can watch you eat what you ordered for yourself.

But for the sake of marital peace and not embarrassing your wife, maybe you could do this:

So you don't get the almost empty plate with 2 pathetic morsels of YOUR appetizer left at the end of it, how about this when it's brought:

Put half or 1/3 of it on a separate plate and say, "If you'd like some of my appetizer, here is some of it to pass."

[charlie49]

I agree with you since the topic of appetizers had been discussed before ordering. Sometimes I order an appetizer at Bonefish and split an entee with my wife and I intend to eat the entire appetizer. This is made clear to the table when we are discussing our dinner choices. Friends realize this is my dinner choice and do not expect me to share it.

You may appease your wife by saying you are ordering an appetizer for your self and if the table would like to share one, you will buy one for them.

Charlie

[getdul981]

Originally Posted by Bill-n-Brillo

TH - I'll side with your perspective, without question.

Bill

Exactly!!!! Everyone had the same opportunity as you to order an appetizer. If they wanted one even after you got yours, they could still have ordered one. Any time we are going to share with others at the table, it is understood before we order.

We're kinda picky folks any way. We don't usually share with anyone except with each other.

[chuckinca]

Originally Posted by sunday;316***

Come to think of it...nor do I dine with anyone that I do not have full intent on treating anyway.

To a certain extent, such as splitting the tab evenly when it might be really be a 60/40 split or so, I do also. We have a long time lady friend who always gets a $60 or so bottle of wine and always gets the most expensive entree on the menu; however, when they visit our house her hubby always brings a couple nice bottles of wine.


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