[westcoast]

I have a friend who is obese and has very bad eating habits. I feel
he is killing himself. So many health issues because of it. I am asking
what might be available in this area for someone in this condition.
Something more than a weight loss program would be needed.

Any suggestions would be welcome.

[sunnyatlast]

Amongst the usual methods people will reasonably recommend, consider this obesity as an emotional and psychological problem, as well as a physiological and aesthetic one.

This book provides insight to what I have seen in the behavior patterns feeding friends' and relatives' obesity and other eating disorders.

See "When Food is Love" by clicking this icon: [ame]http://www.amazon.com/When-Food-Love-Exploring-Relationship/dp/0452268184/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1434826505&sr=8-1&keywords=when+food+is+love[/ame]

[dbussone]

Originally Posted by westcoast

I have a friend who is obese and has very bad eating habits. I feel

he is killing himself. So many health issues because of it. I am asking

what might be available in this area for someone in this condition.

Something more than a weight loss program would be needed.



Any suggestions would be welcome.

It sounds like your friend might require several resources. 1) a good physician who can deal with related medical issues, 2) a nutritionist who can coach him and educate your friend about foods and their preparation, & 3) a good psychologist who can help him understand the underlying cause of his poor eating habit, then work to correct those issues.

Your friend is fortunate to have your concern. It is a difficult circumstance to deal with. At some point a good Bariatric surgery program may be helpful but he needs to correct the basic issues first.

Good luck!

[CFrance]

Originally Posted by dbussone

It sounds like your friend might require several resources. 1) a good physician who can deal with related medical issues, 2) a nutritionist who can coach him and educate your friend about foods and their preparation, & 3) a good psychologist who can help him understand the underlying cause of his poor eating habit, then work to correct those issues.

Your friend is fortunate to have your concern. It is a difficult circumstance to deal with. At some point a good Bariatric surgery program may be helpful but he needs to correct the basic issues first.

Good luck!

I agree with all this, but I might add that if your friend is not committed to doing anything about his condition, nothing may change.

[dbussone]

Originally Posted by CFrance

I agree with all this, but I might add that if your friend is not committed to doing anything about his condition, nothing may change.

That probably should have been point #1 in my post. Excellent!

[hulahips]

I just had a friend visit who is 59 and because of her weight in extremely poor health. She could barely do anything. There is so much help out there today ex weight watchers, tops, food addict groups, tons of books and info but the person must want to lose weight.

The real culprit often is lifestyle. This friend eats poorly you stated and probably doesn't exercise. If you want to keep your friend, its probably best to say nothing unless they ask you for help. People know they need to lose weight but its easier to sit in a chair, take meds then it is to eat healthy and get to the gym. No pain, no gain as they say

[Barefoot]

If he is willing to see a Psychologist, that would be a good first step.
However I've rarely seen a man who seeks out counseling unless a woman has a gun to his head.
I have friends who attend Weight Watchers, and swear by it. Not only to lose weight, but to maintain the weight loss.
They tell me that the WW Program teaches you how make good nutritional choices.
Perhaps you could phone around and find a WW group that has some male members.
I think there are also TOPS groups in The Villages.
Losing weight in a supportive group environment often helps people stay on the lifestyle changes necessary.
Most of all, he won't change unless he is committed to losing weight.
All your good intentions in the world won't change him, it has to come from within.

[Floridagal]

I found out that when an overweight person is ready to loose weight he/she has to be ready on there own. All the nagging and telling him/her what to do and not do will not work. I found this out with my husband. He was extremely over weight and one day he just decided to loose the weight. He joined the gym, watched what he ate and he lost 100 lbs in one year. He told me he would never put back that weight and so far it is over two years and he has not put back a single pound. Now I'm telling him he is getting to skinny...lol

[Abby10]

There are several OA (Overeaters Anonymous) group meetings in and around The Villages area. I believe I saw them listed in the rec news, but you can also locate them by searching their website. It is a 12 step program similar to AA and NA with lots of support from others who understand the situation and the process. Many psychologists recommend programs like this for people who have failed with other weight loss methods. I hope your friend seeks help, but only he/she can make that decision. It's so kind of you to care.

[manaboutown]

OA can help but find meetings where most of the folks are not still obese. If the long time regulars at a meeting are obese they are not in recovery.

I found three in TV. https://www.oa.org/membersgroups/find-a-meeting/

[kcrazorbackfan]

Originally Posted by CFrance

I agree with all this, but I might add that if your friend is not committed to doing anything about his condition, nothing may change.

It all starts with that person wanting to commit to losing the weight. By chance, my wife and I have seen a person the last couple of days in the back seat of a 4 person cart that needed the entire seat because he was so big. And what was he doing tonight at Brownwood? Sitting in the back seat of the cart eating a huge pizza.

[tippyclubb]

Originally Posted by kcrazorbackfan

It all starts with that person wanting to commit to losing the weight. By chance, my wife and I have seen a person the last couple of days in the back seat of a 4 person cart that needed the entire seat because he was so big. And what was he doing tonight at Brownwood? Sitting in the back seat of the cart eating a huge pizza.

He was doing what made him happy. What's wrong with that?

Westcoast I agree with others it has to be a decision your friend makes. When and if that time comes he will need your support.

[Abby10]

Originally Posted by kcrazorbackfan

It all starts with that person wanting to commit to losing the weight. By chance, my wife and I have seen a person the last couple of days in the back seat of a 4 person cart that needed the entire seat because he was so big. And what was he doing tonight at Brownwood? Sitting in the back seat of the cart eating a huge pizza.

To me, that is so sad. I know to some what you describe seems incredulous, to others it may seem to be what makes him happy, and still others see it as an addiction/disease just like alcoholism or drugs. No matter which way you look at it, it can be life threatening and I get the feeling that is what the OP is concerned about for his/her friend. I hope, if it is his desire to do so, that he finds the proper help and support that he needs. No one can do this for him. Praying for your friend, westcoast.

[Abby10]

Originally Posted by manaboutown

OA can help but find meetings where most of the folks are not still obese. If the long time regulars at a meeting are obese they are not in recovery.

I found three in TV. https://www.oa.org/membersgroups/find-a-meeting/

You are so right, manaboutown. Be it changing the way you eat or increasing your exercise/activity, it's best to be around those who are actively doing it and will be a motivation to you not a deterrent. May be necessary to check out several different meetings to find the right fit. Thanks for adding the link.

[rjm1cc]

Originally Posted by westcoast

I have a friend who is obese and has very bad eating habits. I feel
he is killing himself. So many health issues because of it. I am asking
what might be available in this area for someone in this condition.
Something more than a weight loss program would be needed.

Any suggestions would be welcome.

Hopefully the person is not the cook or shopper. If true work on a better home diet. If there are no cookies in the house then they won't be eaten. If the person wants cookies let them go out and buy. Be careful on the type of restaurants they go to. This might help a little.