Gray Hair -- Fight It or Give In?

Closed Thread
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 01-28-2012, 11:03 PM
Schaumburger's Avatar
Schaumburger Schaumburger is offline
Sage
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Schaumburg, IL - Chicago suburb - TV Wannabee
Posts: 4,257
Thanks: 1,004
Thanked 165 Times in 81 Posts
Default Gray Hair -- Fight It or Give In?

In the past year, I've been noticing quite a bit more gray hair. I get it colored about every 7 weeks (I've tried the home coloring route, but I'm hand challenged and getting it colored professionally looks better for me). When I'm up to the 7 week mark the gray hair is getting pretty noticeable -- at least it is to me.

So for the ladies of TOTV -- do most of you fight the gray hair or embrace it? And if you did eventually embrace the gray hair at what age did you start embracing it?

Looking at photos of a few prominent women in politics: Nancy Pelosi age71, Hillary Rodham Clinton age 64, Michele Bachman age 55, Jan Brewer age 67, I don't see a lot of gray hair on these ladies. Do you think they are coloring their hair or just very fortunate? And at the age of 65+ does a head of entirely dark brown hair or golden blond hair look realistic/natural?

Just wondering what the ladies of TOTV think about this.
  #2  
Old 01-28-2012, 11:23 PM
Barefoot's Avatar
Barefoot Barefoot is offline
Sage
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Winters in TV, Summers in Canada.
Posts: 17,669
Thanks: 1,694
Thanked 243 Times in 184 Posts
Default

Of course the prominent women you mentioned don't colour their hair.

A lot of Villagers find that highlights are a good solution.
__________________
Barefoot At Last
No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.
Saving one dog will not change the world, but surely for that one dog, the world will change forever.
  #3  
Old 01-28-2012, 11:37 PM
KatzPajamas's Avatar
KatzPajamas KatzPajamas is offline
Gold member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: NW OHIO...but I am a Village Wannabee :)
Posts: 1,304
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

For the last 10 years, I got highlights and something called a glaze (it slowly washes out instead of having an abrupt line of gray hair). It has now been close to 6 months since I had any highlights or glaze done, and I have quite alot of gray around my face. My family is supportive of me going gray, especially my husband. I have also had a few compliments from friends about it.
My 82 year old mother in law still has her hair dyed on schedule. It is supposed to be a dark red, but often is dark purple instead. Either way, it is a stark contrast to her very pale complexion. She thinks the lack of gray makes her look younger, while most of the family thinks it makes her face look older. One hs to wonder if the soft gray isn't nature's way of helping us not look like we are off to Trick or Treat.
  #4  
Old 01-29-2012, 12:06 AM
gerryann's Avatar
gerryann gerryann is offline
Platinum member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,924
Thanks: 0
Thanked 10 Times in 6 Posts
Default

I died my hair for many years, then decided to let it go natural. Turned out it was completely white and I liked it. Then I moved back by my daughter. The first thing she said when she saw me was.....Mom, I have a good hairdresser. Well, I gave in and last December (2010), I started dying it again. ( a fairly light blond). Well now I'm staying here in TV and seeing many.many woman with shiny white, beautiful hair. So, I decided just yesterday to let it go natural again. When I go back to my daughters and she tells me she doesn't like it...I will tell her it's ME, and if she doesn't like it........oh well......
  #5  
Old 01-29-2012, 03:28 AM
TrudyM's Avatar
TrudyM TrudyM is offline
Gold member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Bought Tamarind Grove, Mercer Island Wa, previously NH,FLA,Hi,CT,CA,GA, Hubby from Hawaii
Posts: 1,085
Thanks: 0
Thanked 7 Times in 2 Posts
Default Got tired of the skunk effect

I got tired of the roots always showing and went white quite awhile ago. It was still grey in the back up till about 5 years ago. I started going grey at 18 so dyed it for a long time. Let it go natural when I hit 40 by then it was mostly white. I am lazy however and a little cheap (ok alot cheap) so I also wear it very long. I guess I am stuck in the 60's. If it's short I need to perm it another reason I stopped coloring it at the time I was perming it and it was getting too dry with both dyeing and perm. I have notice that more women are letting it go white at least around here but back when I let mine go natural everyone thought I was nuts.
Times have changed.
Trudy
  #6  
Old 01-29-2012, 06:42 AM
ddan32162 ddan32162 is offline
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 50
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default No longer fighting it and glad

I, too, colored my hair for many years. I have (had) very dark natural color, and for quite some time I kept going lighter in order to keep the roots from showing up so quickly. Last year I turned 60, and decided to make the change. First I highlighted - it was okay; then as it grew out, I did the non-permanent color a few times in order to blend in, and now I'm completely natural. Quite a bit of gray, but nicely "highlighted" all by itself. I'm saving a ton of money not getting it colored, and I feel super about how I look. I don't have the body of a 30 something, so why should my hair look like a 30 something! ! !
  #7  
Old 01-29-2012, 08:11 AM
Uptown Girl's Avatar
Uptown Girl Uptown Girl is offline
Platinum member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Villages
Posts: 1,561
Thanks: 40
Thanked 15 Times in 10 Posts
Default

In my professional (retired) opinion, there are a number of things to consider, like:
What color is the grey around your face.... sparkly or battleship dull?
What color are your eyebrows.... getting grey there?
What is your base skin tone? Have you noticed it change?
What shape is your hair in now? Has continual chemical work compromised it?
Would you change your hairstyle if you were suddenly completely grey?

Here's something to try:
Put on your makeup, then wrap a black towel, sweat shirt, whatever you have that's black, around your head turban-style so just the grey shows around your face. Stand back and observe for a moment. Imagine you are meeting YOU for the first time. What stands out? Does the grey throw focus to your eyes? Smile?

My hair was always long and dark brown/black. My intention was to grey naturally, but as that happened, it looked pretty bad and everyone continually said I looked tired...
so I began to dye.
Being in 'the industry' I couldn't EVER attend my clients with ugly roots hanging out of my head, so my touch-ups were frequent... every 2 weeks.
It became a pain in the butt and even with the finest products my hair and scalp were bombarded too often for my personal comfort.

Upon deciding to move to TV, I wore a baseball hat until my roots were grown out enough, gave myself a pixie and styled it disheveled a bit while it grew to a manageable length. It was the most efficient way to make the transition. (especially from my brunette color)

The freedom of it all is a wonderful thing, and my husband loves my new look. In fact, I get compliments on my hair from perfect strangers all the time. It sparkles in the sun and looks even better with a little Florida tan.
  #8  
Old 01-29-2012, 10:00 AM
DandyGirl's Avatar
DandyGirl DandyGirl is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Village of Duval
Posts: 353
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

I started going gray/white around my face in my 30's so I started coloring. What a chore to keep it up cause my hair grows fast. After having chemo for breast cancer in 2009, I decided when my hair comes back it will be natural. Love my salt & pepper hair (heavy on the salt!) The hubby loves it too.
  #9  
Old 01-29-2012, 10:03 AM
graciegirl's Avatar
graciegirl graciegirl is offline
Sage
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 40,008
Thanks: 4,856
Thanked 5,507 Times in 1,907 Posts
Send a message via AIM to graciegirl
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by DandyGirl View Post
I started going gray/white around my face in my 30's so I started coloring. What a chore to keep it up cause my hair grows fast. After having chemo for breast cancer in 2009, I decided when my hair comes back it will be natural. Love my salt & pepper hair (heavy on the salt!) The hubby loves it too.
Here is a huge hug from two girls who lost their hair to chemo. Hair is so nice to have in the winter to keep your head warm in Ohio..who knew?

So glad your hair is back.

Gray, grayish, blonde, white...any color...celebrate who you are and be glad you are here!

Gracie and daughter Helene.
__________________
It is better to laugh than to cry.
  #10  
Old 01-29-2012, 10:50 AM
Happinow's Avatar
Happinow Happinow is offline
Sage
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Queensbury, NY, The Villages
Posts: 2,626
Thanks: 64
Thanked 308 Times in 58 Posts
Default Gray or not to gray??

Gracie I just knew you were a survivor! I can tell it in your positive attitude. Bless your heart and your daughter's heart. I lost a sister to cancer.

As for the gray hair?? I think some women can wear it distinctively and some....well....should get it colored. I guess it depends on how you feel with gray hair. If it doesn't bother you than keep it. If it doesn't make you feel good about yourself then color it. Just remember it's not what's on the outside, it's what's on the inside......

I'm not going to say if I color mine or not! Oh I must come clean, I do color it, but just around the edges!
  #11  
Old 01-29-2012, 11:35 AM
sandybill2 sandybill2 is offline
Veteran member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 587
Thanks: 0
Thanked 9 Times in 6 Posts
Default

I was going regularly to hairdresser to have my hair "highlighted." My granddaughter looked at me one day and asked "Grandma, why are you paying to have your hair highlighted---when you have natural highlights? I stopped having my hair highlighted after she asked that question. Of course, my natural highlights are gray but I am happy aging as gracefully as I can---and I am saving money by not having highlights done which gives me more to spend on the good life here in The Villages.
  #12  
Old 01-29-2012, 11:56 AM
DandyGirl's Avatar
DandyGirl DandyGirl is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Village of Duval
Posts: 353
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by graciegirl View Post
Here is a huge hug from two girls who lost their hair to chemo. Hair is so nice to have in the winter to keep your head warm in Ohio..who knew?

So glad your hair is back.

Gray, grayish, blonde, white...any color...celebrate who you are and be glad you are here!

Gracie and daughter Helene.
Hugs back to you girls too!
  #13  
Old 01-29-2012, 12:51 PM
debzaranti's Avatar
debzaranti debzaranti is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Village of Amelia
Posts: 127
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default To grey or not to grey??

I've always had long hair and started to grey in my 20s. Dyed it for about 25 years (dark warm brown), had to dye it every 3 weeks because of the amount of white showing upon grow-out. One day I took a really close look at myself in the mirror in some harsh, bright light...and came to the realization that the dark hair wasn't fooling anybody about my age but me! The "roadmap" that is my face told the truth of the years. LOL!

Had my stylist whack it off to about 1" all over my head (cut off most of the color), then let it grow back long, but it's natural color. Does it make me look older, yeah, maybe...but I AM OLDER NOW!! I do get compliments on the natural color...surprisingly a lot of them are from men (women too)! Who knew men even noticed a woman's hair color??

I'd say, go for it....try grey. If you hate it, go back to coloring it. Be aware, however, you may need to change your make-up and clothing colors once you go grey. If your colors are too subtle, you look washed-out. Too bright and you look like you belong on Clown Alley. It's a fine line there! LOL! Good luck.
  #14  
Old 01-29-2012, 05:18 PM
Schaumburger's Avatar
Schaumburger Schaumburger is offline
Sage
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Schaumburg, IL - Chicago suburb - TV Wannabee
Posts: 4,257
Thanks: 1,004
Thanked 165 Times in 81 Posts
Default

Ladies, thank you for the feedback. I will probably fight the fight for a couple more years...or maybe next week I will decide to let nature take it's course. Wondering how much genetics plays a part...my dad was almost totally gray by his mid-forties. My mom didn't start getting gray hair until she was in her early 50's, and went gray very slowly through
her 50's.
  #15  
Old 01-29-2012, 08:30 PM
De Lis De Lis is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 221
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default Going Gray and Loving It!

We retired in the summer and moved to The Villages at the same time. Haven't dyed my hair since; the game is over and I don't have to try to look younger or "more caring" about my appearance. I just want to age gracefully and with dignity. I keep my hair trimmed regularly and think it looks great. What more would I want? Those are my personal thoughts.

Question ladies: Why does our culture always talk about "anti-aging" products? Why can't we refer to them as "aging gracefully" products? As Baby Boomers can't we control this factor? I just find it demeaning.
Closed Thread


You are viewing a new design of the TOTV site. Click here to revert to the old version.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:16 PM.