[graciegirl]

What traits are those that matter when you pick friends? A little, or a lot, or not at all?

Age

Gender

General health

Sense of humor

Sense of responsiblity towards rules

How they look

How they dress

Amount of money

Level of success

Educational background

Religion

Political leaning

Acceptance of differences in others.

Size of home

Value family

Value pets

Smoking or not smoking

Drinking or not drinking.



Add to the list if your think of something.

THESE ARE NOT A lIST OF THE THINGS I USE TO CHOOSE FRIENDS....except for kindness and responsibility and humor.

[CFrance]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

What traits are those that matter when you pick friends? A little, or a lot, or not at all?

Age

Gender

General health

Sense of humor

Sense of responsiblity towards rules

How they look

How they dress

Amount of money

Level of success

Educational background

Religion

Political leaning

Acceptance of differences in others.

Size of home

Value family

Value pets

Smoking or not smoking

Drinking or not drinking.



Add to the list if your think of something.

Oh, Geez!!! What a question! I have to say sense of humor. If someone can laugh or make me laugh, I'm drawn to them. I may change my mind later due to some of your other criteria not being there (I wish you had numbered them, Gracie, so I could just say if 5,13,15,16 are not there, I'm put off), but I have a lot of trouble connecting with people who have no sense of humor.

I also find that my friendships evolve from people who share a hobby/sport/activity. For instance, whenever we've relocated for job reasons, joining a tennis team always brought me friends. Other friends came from school organizations (way back when the kids... you know), church affiliations, etc. Just clicking with people while doing things you like to do.

[olgreeneyes]

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Most people who know me say I could talk to a tree, so I think one of the criteria is that someone is able to put up with ME! I appreciate a sense of humor, but not at the expense of others and I like a sense of responsibility also. The rest doesn't matter, but I am an animal lover so I need for a friend to at least understand and accept that. I think friends pick each other, and they come in many varieties, short term, long distance, neighbors, co-workers, etc. and that's the fun of having them! Each person brings something different to a relationship of any kind and that's why we are all unique in our own way.

[Golfingnut]

Kind and not selfish.
Happy and not Grumpy
Half full and not half empty
Optimist and not pessimist
Respect Authority not Fear it
Non Smoker
Not prejudice
No Carry Permit
No Extremists
No Fanatics.

OK OK I'll quit.

[tainsley]

Sense of humor is a must! All of my friends have that! They also are kind, thoughtful, fun, and I know I can count on each one of them in time of need. They too can count on me as well. Doesn't matter their age, gender, religion or political persuasion. How much or how little they have. I love each of them!

[kittygilchrist]

The very best thing my mother showed me was fierce LOYALTY. Being like that has gotten me upside down in several relationships when it was not mutual. So I have learned to avoid people who can't trust, as that is evidence that they themselves lack the ability to bond mutually.

[alemorkam]

I really dont think you pick friends. I think it just happens. A friend could come from anywhere at anytime. I think we just know when it happens.

[JoeC1947]

Originally Posted by alemorkam

I really dont think you pick friends. I think it just happens. A friend could come from anywhere at anytime. I think we just know when it happens.

You're right. We don't get to pick our friends, it just happens. The way I look at it, everyone is my friend until they prove otherwise.

[DougB]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

What traits are those that matter when you pick friends? A little, or a lot, or not at all?

Age

Gender

General health

Sense of humor

Sense of responsiblity towards rules

How they look

How they dress

Amount of money

Level of success

Educational background

Religion

Political leaning

Acceptance of differences in others.

Size of home

Value family

Value pets

Smoking or not smoking

Drinking or not drinking.



Add to the list if your think of something.

You can't be serious with that list???? Size of home, age, how they look, how they dress, amount of money, educational background, etc. I was looking for the LOL after it.

[Bill-n-Brillo]

Doug, I don't think that's Gracie's personal list. I think she's just throwing out a long list of potential things that might be criteria to different people - they can pick out the ones that are important to them.

Bill

[gomoho]

Originally Posted by DougB

You can't be serious with that list???? Size of home, age, how they look, how they dress, amount of money, educational background, etc. I was looking for the LOL after it.

DougB - it's a sad reality these are criteria some people use, but I bet you would never catch them admitting it.

[redwitch]

Acceptance of me, life, other people. I really don't like judgmental people and I cannot tolerate a bigot. Making me smile and smiling at my silliness is a plus. I do have to trust them. They do need to have a generosity of spirit.

One person I consider one of my dearest friends in TV is my polar opposite -- we don't agree politically, have totally different passions (she's a knitter, I can't even figure out how to hold the needles), she sweats the small stuff too much and worries about the what ifs. For that, she accepts me as I am, is never mean to others, would give you the shirt of her back (worse, makes you take it). However, we're there for each other -- any time, any thing, no hesitation. I am so privileged to have met her and to have had her enter my life.

I consider Gracie a friend and she can drive me absolutely bonkers! But I wouldn't have her change even one little part of herself (well, maybe her passion for the Morses).

Another friend here is very much like me. We think alike, we like the same stupid jokes, we help each other. We have just enough differences to not be bored with each other. I actually gave her a book to read after I finished it and asked her if I liked it. She understood perfectly what I meant, started it, couldn't finish it and told me I didn't.

I feel so lucky to have these women as friends. I feel fortunate to have met so many people here that I like and respect.

I don't have a list. I don't think I could even make a list of what I need in a friend, I just know when I find a friend I'm grateful for them and bask in the glow of their love.

[DougB]

Hi Bill,
I did not think that was Gracie's personal list either. I just can not imagine anyone would opt to "choose" a friend on the traits listed.

[redwitch]

If Gracie used the criteria of the list she made -- I would never be considered one of her friends. I'm on this side of poor, I rent, I live in a manufactured home that has cockroaches that we can't rid of as roomies (ugh!), I live in shorts and t-shirts or tank tops. So, don't confuse the list with Gracie's criteria -- they ain't the same!

[BobnBev]

You can pick your friends----

You can pick your nose-----


BUT


You CAN'T pick your relatives.