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Retirement Panic

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Old 07-05-2013, 03:08 PM
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Anybody experience emotional / mental shutdown when facing retirement?How did you get past it?
Did you deal with all right away or put off the decisions that could wait.

Husband is going to hit the retirement button next Thursday.
We are both having Panic attacks. Usually I handle all paperwork, plans, logistics etc. for our marriage unit. However my brain has shut down. I pulled out my retirement preplan file done back in 2006 when he first qualified for his early pension and we considered retiring to the villages (I had been offered a job there-- long story). I realized none of the steps to take are now applicable.

I have been sitting around for a week in a state of total brain freeze. The to do list is so long I don't know where to start. I keep thinking I am forgetting something vital that will create a mess.
I sit and read post after post here thinking it will give me an emotional boost and get me back in action. Nothing.

How did you handle it when it was you retiring?
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Old 07-05-2013, 03:20 PM
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Trudy, it will work out fine. Everyone has some degree of fear, emotional ups and downs, and other angst when going through this. Go back to your plan, update if it no longer applies, change it if necessary. Do a 30 day, 90 day and 1 year plan and that helps many folks put it in perspective. Decide the top 10 things you want to do or accomplish and write them down. Go over them together and prioritize them. Be sure to include some fun things in the list.

A new phase of life is beginning. Embrace it and enjoy it.
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Old 07-05-2013, 03:30 PM
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Do it if you can so if you don't and it's too late you have no regrets!!! My husband and I kept telling ourselves we want to be young enough and healthy enough to enjoy our retirement.
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Old 07-05-2013, 04:30 PM
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Do whatever you think is best. My wife and I retired on the same day. No panic at all. We had financially planned our retirements so there are no money problems. If money is your worry, perhaps it is best to continue work. If it is just worrying about what you will do, you will adjust quickly. Moving to a retirement community and continuing work takes 99 percent of the fun out of retirement. You will be working while all your friends are enjoying retirement.
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Old 07-05-2013, 04:37 PM
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Do whatever you think is best. My wife and I retired on the same day. No panic at all. We had financially planned our retirements so there are no money problems. If money is your worry, perhaps it is best to continue work. If it is just worrying about what you will do, you will adjust quickly. Moving to a retirement community and continuing work takes 99 percent of the fun out of retirement. You will be working while all your friends are enjoying retirement.
It isn't money I have figured that even if we don't list and sell the house we can get by. I don't know what is causing the panic, it's like when you leave the house and you know you turned everything off but still feel like you forgot something.
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Old 07-05-2013, 05:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TrudyM View Post
Anybody experience emotional / mental shutdown when facing retirement?How did you get past it?
Did you deal with all right away or put off the decisions that could wait.

Husband is going to hit the retirement button next Thursday.
We are both having Panic attacks. Usually I handle all paperwork, plans, logistics etc. for our marriage unit. However my brain has shut down. I pulled out my retirement preplan file done back in 2006 when he first qualified for his early pension and we considered retiring to the villages (I had been offered a job there-- long story). I realized none of the steps to take are now applicable.

I have been sitting around for a week in a state of total brain freeze. The to do list is so long I don't know where to start. I keep thinking I am forgetting something vital that will create a mess.
I sit and read post after post here thinking it will give me an emotional boost and get me back in action. Nothing.

How did you handle it when it was you retiring?
I understand your feelings...been there, done that! I know it is silly but here is what I always told my children when they were over stressed...how do you eat an elephant ? One bite at a time! Just keep taking that bite and the next one will fall in place.
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Old 07-05-2013, 05:45 PM
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Originally Posted by TrudyM View Post
It isn't money I have figured that even if we don't list and sell the house we can get by. I don't know what is causing the panic, it's like when you leave the house and you know you turned everything off but still feel like you forgot something.
not to make light of your post, but it reminded me of when we sold our house in MN and were leaving to head to MI, we had already backed out of our driveway when we realized we had left our little dog in the empty house all alone.
When I retired, I did not feel panic but it was weird to me that they collected my employee badge, computer and corporate credit card and when I left, I could no longer just walk into the building without stopping at the guard's desk and getting an escort, this is after working there for 34 years.
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Old 07-05-2013, 07:33 PM
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big deep breath...do yoga...see someone...it shall pass...as i always say

do not worry about things you can not change
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Old 07-05-2013, 07:54 PM
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Think about the type of people you are. My husband worried about what he would do when he retired. I knew he is the type of person who would go find things to do once retirement hit. He is not the type of person to sit around. And he did find things to do.

You will still be the same people you are now. If you're planners, you'll still be planners. If you're physically active, you'll still be that. Whatever. Don't worry. Your retirement doesn't have to be totally planned out from the get-go. It can evolve.
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Old 07-05-2013, 08:02 PM
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I have retired three times. This is not a joke. The first time I ran into a woman I had dated in high school in the pro shop of my country club. She told me I was to young too retire. The pro, a guy I knew from high school was setting me up with 75 year olds on Wednesday mornings for foursomes. I was 35 and realized I was on a work break. I went back to work, retiring again in 1988 at age 46. Then, I had a great opportunity in 1990 and moved to SoCal for a great job. I eventually retired in 1994 at age 52 and never looked back. It just takes some adjustment. The reason I worked was so I could retire young and beat "the system". I could hardly wait to put on a boiler suit, jump in the motorhome and hit the road, which I did for a while.
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Old 07-05-2013, 08:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TrudyM View Post
Anybody experience emotional / mental shutdown when facing retirement?How did you get past it?
Did you deal with all right away or put off the decisions that could wait.

Husband is going to hit the retirement button next Thursday.
We are both having Panic attacks. Usually I handle all paperwork, plans, logistics etc. for our marriage unit. However my brain has shut down. I pulled out my retirement preplan file done back in 2006 when he first qualified for his early pension and we considered retiring to the villages (I had been offered a job there-- long story). I realized none of the steps to take are now applicable.

I have been sitting around for a week in a state of total brain freeze. The to do list is so long I don't know where to start. I keep thinking I am forgetting something vital that will create a mess.
I sit and read post after post here thinking it will give me an emotional boost and get me back in action. Nothing.

How did you handle it when it was you retiring?
I'm not really getting it but the "To do" list should be very short.
You should be lining up your income sources and watching to see them post to your accounts. Then living with it for a few months at least.
Go to diner , movies relax...unless you are leaving businesses or jobs you love to go to...that's different.

If it's fear of activities in retirement... you are looking at the right place to come to live...go for it! There's work too should you wish to.

I retired May 1, 2012 and the wife January 1 after moving here..there are no regrets so far. We both wonder at the 40 years we put into working.

Try to relax; this phase will pass.
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Old 07-05-2013, 08:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CFrance View Post
Your retirement doesn't have to be totally planned out from the get-go. It can evolve.
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Old 07-05-2013, 09:13 PM
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Not to be too flippant but people have been retiring for years and everyone gets through it. What else can you do? It sounds like you are both great planners and everything is in order. I think everything will work out fine for you both and you will look back and think, "I should have retired sooner!"
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Old 07-05-2013, 09:23 PM
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Sometimes you just have to make a blind leap of faith, and trust in the Universe. I realize it's a trite thing to say, but just remember: When one door closes, another opens.

You will be just fine. We've all been there and experienced retirement in different ways. I jumped in with blind faith and never looked back. Fireboy planned and fretted and budgeted and worried and second-guessed himself. And he has never been happier.

I bet 99.9% of us are so happy to be retired.
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Old 07-05-2013, 10:50 PM
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Thanks for the support.
I have always been a planner.
A little bit of a control freak.
I just can't shake the feeling that something is being missed.
I am sure you are all right and this too will pass.
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