[islandgal]

I really enjoy this much-needed thread.

I’ve been divorced for 27 years with no desire to remarry. Was in the party scene for about 8 years and had a few nice relationships.
I have had a long distance relationship for 20 years (my choice) which involved lots of fun, companionship and travel..
When I moved here 2 years ago, I decided to cool that relationship and spread my wings, although they haven’t flown anywhere since my move here!!!!! I agree with Peazoup. I think I would really like to have a "LAT", a soul mate.

[redwitch]

Single for 22 years now. Had found my soulmate after my marriage. Truly had no real interest for a serious relationship since breaking up with my soulmate. I like dating, even semi-relationships (a few steps above friends with benefits) but really don't want any more. At present, I'm not looking, not trying to find and it would have to fall into my lap pretty dang hard for me to notice.

[islandgal]

Red - I love the way you express yourself

[Peazoup]

Isn't this interesting? I think years ago, when my girls were young, I would love to have remarried (my ex died not long after our divorce). I always dreamed of having the "Brady Bunch" kind of family. But, I guess it just wasn't in the cards. I would never say never, but now, especially after reading all the prenup threads, it must be a little complicated to tie the knot and wonder what the point would be at our stage in life. So, it seems we are all sort of in the same mind set - at least we ladies. How about the men? Who do you think are more prone to remarry - men or women and why? Let's hear it from you fellas. Don't by shy! We won't send you casseroles! :-*

[benj]

Peazoup,
From my point of view. I'm really conflicted. I was married young and for over 30 years. Many times I thought being single or alone would be just great, but being single now for over three years I'm not so sure. Several people in tv have told me you don't marry you just live together. After reading all the prenup stuff on totv I guess maybe their right.It must be more complicated than I thought. But for me ,I hope I can find someone to share what ever time is left for me. Married or live together who knows. I had a best friend for 37 years and even though we bickered some we each knew the other would be there for them, and wherever we went we where never alone. My point of view is from a never divorced person.
From a selfish point of view. Cancer took 18 months to take my wife. I quit working and stayed home with her. I went to every Dr's appt, every chemo,every operation,a stem cell transplant, and was holding her when she passed. I'm proud of that, and think that was important, and i hope that when my time comes there might be someone there for me.
Besides that I think men need someone there to remind us what jerks we are sometimes.
And peazoup NO CASSEROLES ?

[Peazoup]

benj,
You have paved your way to heaven! How very sad to lose your other half after 30 years. I wonder if you ever get over such devastation. I always feel great compassion for folk who have lost their loved ones especially in their later years when you're supposed to "ride off into the sunset" together. It must be hard to think of another relationship after such a loss. There must be a whole bunch of others on TOTV who are in the same boat. Hopefully, you'll find another special person to keep loneliness at bay.
And now you've done it........ until then.............. expect casseroles galore

[Blondie]

This is hard for me..but necessary. I was married young and over thirty years...I adored him. He had a brain tumor which we treated ( 3 craneotomies, max radiation, and much chemo) for 16 years. Jim always told the MD's to do whatever they wanted to him from Sept. to June, but Blondie and I travel in the summer so it was off limits. It worked until the last summer when the MD said you need to have more chemo---Jim said---see you in Sept. Sept came and he thought worse case scenario he would have another operation...but the tumor had crossed the mid-line of the brain, and surgery was not possible. He had more chemo, but come December, it was evident that further treatment was futile. I took off the next six months from work to be with him, and he died on May 31st (that was seven years ago). One thing I have learned is that no matter how badly your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief. Jim surely was my soulmate, and I can't imagine that anyone could ove me as much as he did....so I haven't dated. I don't want to sound morose, b/c I am one of the luckiest people I know. I have a beautiful daughter, wonderful son-in-law, and two of the best grandkids in the world. I love dancing, going out with friends, making new friends, and adventures....and I love TOTV, as it has opened up a whole new world to me.

md blondie

[Peazoup]

mdblondie - hugs, hugs and more hugs. So sad. I'm sitting here at work with mascara running down my cheeks. I'm sure your wonderful family has helped you tremendously as you sound like you have great support to keep going. Bless you.

[benj]

Blondie,
I'm not sure this is what Coney or Peazoup was thinking when they started this thread but ditto your thoughts about totv. I think sometimes that life's only been tough on me then I read posts like yours and (I know this sounds weird) it makes me feel better. This is the first web "forum" I've ever been on and I can't believe how many deeply personal things I've posted to perfect strangers. But thats the thing about totv and tv in general I feel a connection there even though I'm 2500 miles away.
So it's 7 years for you ? Do you ever start to feel better? Benj

[Blondie]

Benj,
That's really hard to answer. I once read that "expecting life to treat you well because you are a good person, is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian." So I guess I try to focus on all the wonderful things I have rather than dwell on the fact that this shouldn't have happened to us. As you say, there are so many others in the world who didn't ever have what I had, and still have. You know no one can take our great memories from us, and I bet you have many wonderful ones as well. So, I guess I can say that, yes, it does get better. I am so looking foward to meeting all of the TOTV folks, and start another new chapter of my life. I'm scared but I know it's time to move on. When Jim died I had to reinvent myself so to speak...not easy for me. One thing I did was that I used to ride on the back of Jim's motorcycle, and when he died I got my own license and now I have my own. I am having it shipped down to TV in Sept.and hope to ride with the Motorcycle "Gang" down there. Doesn't that sound like fun? I have also signed myself onto the Cruise with TOTV----a very bold move for me. I hope I don't spend all my time in my cabin.

Anyway, I am very appreciative to you and all the TOTV folks for including me and making me feel welcome. Hope I can meet you soon, Benj----we can share stories about our soulmates.

Blondie

[ConeyIsBabe]

040 BUMP 040

Summer's almost over in south Oregon and I'm looking forward to my favorite season.... the fall. Soon, there will be a crisp cool breeze in the air, beautiful colors everywhere...... the growers' market will have loads of goodies and harvest festivals are always fun, especially Oktoberfests with beer & bratwurst.

Trying to keep this Singles Forum alive - - so - -

Whatcha doin' TV Singles & Wannabees ???

[Blondie]

Hi CIB and all,

I just returned today from TV :'( and tomorrow I will drive to LI NY to spend some time with my sister and her hubby. He has been diagnosed with cancer of the mouth, and will be operated on the first week of Sept. (prayers would be very appreciated).
I'll be back in MD this weekend and head to a soccer tournament (Grandson is playing in VA ) with my daughter, son-in-law, and grandkiddos---great fun--- :#1:
Then...back to MD...pack up the car....and head back to TV for two months. 040
I have such mixed emotions b/c my heart is breaking for my sister and her family, and I am praying that all goes well; however, I know they have a long road ahead of them.

BTW...I had such a wonderful time these past five days in TV meeting many new folks and talking to "old" TOTV friends. Stay dry my friends and I will see you soon.

MDB

[swrinfla]

md blondie:

My wife died of a throat cancer (among other things) 8 years 3 months and 12 days ago! Who said I'm counting?

After slightly more than 5 years of caring and coping, her passing was, honestly, a great joy for us both! Here I am now in TV, enjoying every minute and somewhat astonishing my up north friends who had thought I'd end up as a basket case! [No comments, please, from those of you who think I really am a basket case!]

I have a very good friend whose wife was killed 9 years ago in a t-bone car crash on her way home from her teaching job one afternoon, not a mile from their house. She was one of the most vibrant people I ever knew. Her husband retreated into a shell for a number of years, but now gets out and about and enjoys his solitary life, as do I!

TOTVers are here for you, as I think you already know!

SWR

[Blondie]

SWR, Thank you I appreciate the kind words. I just got back from NY tonight, and my sister, her husband and kids are doing as well as can be expected. They are a close family and care very much about each other.

I will be back in TV in 8 days, and am looking foward to seeing my TOTV friends again.

MDB

[ConeyIsBabe]

Hi blondie ....... wav wav wav swrinfla, benj, Peazoup, wiw, bestmicky, redwitch, ilvgolf, nannie, tkret,

and all lurking singles wav wav wav