[JGibson]

From a physiological perspective many people use kids, grandkids, homes, cars, social status financial status or any other external thing as a way to validate themselves.

Many of these people grew up in a shame and guilt based environment and may have developed low self esteem and insecurities.

So these external things make them whole and gives them some self validation.

Oh course this doesn't apply to everyone who talks about their grandkids but you quickly tell who is using external things to make themselves feel better.

-Dr Drew.

[manaboutown]

Some people are just boring.

[LuvNH]

We are fortunate not to run into people who bore you to death with their brilliant grand children. I have a suggestion for you, but it is not a very nice solution, but it may work. You could wait them out and then ask if they are that amazing how can you bear to be away from them?

[tophcfa]

Originally Posted by AbbyPye

Since my partner Pat and I settled within The Villages, we have been embracing what this community has to offer from its activities to the people that live here. And although we are ever so pleased to mingle with others that we meet day in and day out, we noticed a common thread when others speak to us that still remains since we first came out here some two year before.

When we meet others that are coupled, many (not all) of these married folks tend to tell us (whenever we ask about or not with the emphasis on the latter) about their adult kids with a deep notion about their grandkids! They mention what their kids and their partners/spouses are involved with, and give that heavy emphasis on their grandkids, either with them having them visit from up north/back east, or heading up north/back east to visit them.

When we first mentioned this issue in this forum some time ago, we thought that hearing about their antics would eventually come to pass. What occurred was the total opposite, especially when a major holiday is coming in the near future! Although we do respect that these couples are indeed proud of these grandkids that are part of their life as well as keeping the family legacy alive and well, this notion of hearing this unsolicited news is getting rather long in the tooth!

Has anyone ever experienced a situation that was explained within this post? That is, does anyone encounter those that are coupled up that constantly dote on their grandkids, even though they may reside a long distance away?

Please let me know so I won’t think that I am just dreaming up this scenario!

Many thanks!

Erggggg, you hit a major sore spot. The combination of grandkids and my wife are the primary reason I am not able to spend nearly as much time as I would prefer at our Villages home. What is it with women and the need to constantly be around the kids? To make matters worse, the children keep pumping out the little rug rats like the are friggin pez dispensers. And why can’t they all be born on the same day so we don’t have to go to a dam birthday party almost every frikin month of the year? I’m getting tired of the hassle, time, and expense of traveling between our homes because of grandkids. HUMBUG!

[fdpaq0580]

Originally Posted by DonH57

LOL! You are too funny. I've met those same people who will tell you how their colonoscopy went and if they probably bought the video! Yes. Those countermeasures usually work to repeal them.

If we ever meet, say " hello ", not "how are you". I assure you that the response will be appropriate to your greeting.

[fdpaq0580]

Originally Posted by tophcfa

Erggggg, you hit a major sore spot. The combination of grandkids and my wife are the primary reason I am not able to spend nearly as much time as I would prefer at our Villages home. What is it with women and the need to constantly be around the kids? To make matters worse, the children keep pumping out the little rug rats like the are friggin pez dispensers. And why can’t they all be born on the same day so we don’t have to go to a dam birthday party almost every frikin month of the year? I’m getting tired of the hassle, time, and expense of traveling between our homes because of grandkids. HUMBUG!

OMG! That is very funny and very sad all at the same time. Your wife sounds like she needs a sense of purpose tied to here to give her a reason to stay.

[Gpsma]

Id rather hear about grandkids than golfers complaining

[fdpaq0580]

AbbyPye,

I understand completely. As one who without children of our own, the (what seems like) constant conversations involving kids and grandkids (and Lord help us, dogs/granddogs[?]) can overwhelm one. The problem is that "conversation" is a give and take, two way thing. When the subject is all about something you don't have, you are effectively shut out. The opportunity to add much is severely limited. But, there are some who prefer it that way. Then they can hog the conversation and turn it into a lecture. They will feel great. You will never get back the time.

[Randall55]

I am blessed to have friends who love their families. In a world that seems to have gone crazy, it is nice to cozy up and enjoy the simple things. Let the talks of war, disease, politics, keeping up with the Jones', and money rest. I prefer to watch a video of a child giggling, any day.

[Gpsma]

Amazing how the childless are so inconsiderate with those that have chosen to have families…families..the backbone of this country.

[JoMar]

Originally Posted by tophcfa

Erggggg, you hit a major sore spot. The combination of grandkids and my wife are the primary reason I am not able to spend nearly as much time as I would prefer at our Villages home. What is it with women and the need to constantly be around the kids? To make matters worse, the children keep pumping out the little rug rats like the are friggin pez dispensers. And why can’t they all be born on the same day so we don’t have to go to a dam birthday party almost every frikin month of the year? I’m getting tired of the hassle, time, and expense of traveling between our homes because of grandkids. HUMBUG!

Sounds like you are an enabler....lol. My wife goes up serveral times a year....I go once. The kids and grandkids come here to visit. It's important to her, now so much to me. So there is no need for me to go.

[Velvet]

Originally Posted by fdpaq0580

AbbyPye,

I understand completely. As one who without children of our own, the (what seems like) constant conversations involving kids and grandkids (and Lord help us, dogs/granddogs[?]) can overwhelm one. The problem is that "conversation" is a give and take, two way thing. When the subject is all about something you don't have, you are effectively shut out. The opportunity to add much is severely limited. But, there are some who prefer it that way. Then they can hog the conversation and turn it into a lecture. They will feel great. You will never get back the time.

Well yes, but it takes another person to listen. You can always say, “Oh dear, I forgot to do something, I better do it right now!” As you get up and leave the situation (that is what you forgot to do).

[ThirdOfFive]

Well, as Mom used to say, "you'd b!tch if you were hung with a new rope".

As other posters have mentioned, our age group is prone to gripe. Health as mentioned is a biggie but so are the neighbors, the weather, poor service in restaurants, shops or wherever, the price of _____, how TV is infested with incompetent drivers, etc. etc. ad endless nauseam. Hearing something positive, even if it is about grandkids, comes under the heading of welcome change.

[Ecuadog]

Originally Posted by Two Bills

I find the subject of grandchildren a far better subject than a persons latest medical problem or procedure.
...

My mother would call them "organ recitals".

[Happydaz]

My wife and I feel that having five sons, five daughters in law, and fifteen grandchildren is the most important and gratifying part of our lives. (Besides each other!) But I learned a lesson recently when I was out socializing with my bike club after a ride. I was going on about having children and grandchildren and how this was by far the most gratifying thing in our lives. I did begin to notice that one woman become somewhat perplexed and confused that I would say that. Later her husband drew me aside and said that too much self disclosure may not be the best conversation starter. (They have no children) I agreed with him and now I try to limit my conversations to what interests others. If they want to talk family then I can do that too, but I need to be more considerate and not talk incessantly about subjects that may not interest everyone. Now I try to talk about golf, sports, stock market, etc. Everyone gets to choose how they want to their lives. My way is just one path.