[justjim]

OP: Thank you for your post. This Thread has been very interesting and informative. In the last three years, my wife and I had two special friends who passed from Alzheimer’s and it was a heartbreaking ordeal for their spouses. We have not encountered a situation like you described but I’m sure in TV it could happen on any given day. I see where a bracelet on you (as the caregiver) and patient would be very useful in a similar situation. It makes me wonder why the Alzheimer’s Association discontinued its use. I also agree “common sense” is very useful. Unfortunately that is not always the case. For most of us, further education is needed. We never get too old to learn.

[Taltarzac725]

Originally Posted by justjim

OP: Thank you for your post. This Thread has been very interesting and informative. In the last three years, my wife and I had two special friends who passed from Alzheimer’s and it was a heartbreaking ordeal for their spouses. We have not encountered a situation like you described but I’m sure in TV it could happen on any given day. I see where a bracelet on you (as the caregiver) and patient would be very useful in a similar situation. It makes me wonder why the Alzheimer’s Association discontinued its use. I also agree “common sense” is very useful. Unfortunately that is not always the case. For most of us, further education is needed. We never get too old to learn.

I have never experienced something like my mother and her caregiver went through on July 15, 2022 but assume it happens rather often here in the Villages. Thanks for the kind words.

[yellowtownhouse]

Originally Posted by ThirdOfFive

There are many kinds of dementias, all with some similarities but with significant differences as well. Alzheimer's is the most well known but it is far from the only one. Progressive dementias include Lewy body dementia, Vascular dementia, Frontotemporal dementia, mixed dementia, etc. Other types include Parkinson - related dementia, dementia related to head trauma, Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease, dementia caused by long-term alcohol abuse (often reversible to an extent) etc. etc.

The post to which this response is directed contains a blanket statement that could not be further from the truth, that "They belong in assisted living facilities and should not be out on the streets creating disturbances." Nothing could be further from the truth. No dementia is a static condition that has a totally predictable pattern of progression. In many cases a person with dementia is at his or her most functional early in the day; things may get worse as the day progresses. Not all dementias involve delusionary behavior (the subject of the OP in my opinion). Not all functions are impacted equally: my dad had Parkinson's - related dementia which meant, among other things, that he suffered from delusions and hallucinations but the part of his mind having to do with numbers and figures was a sharp as it ever was. And so on.

I'll give odds that any one of us, if we're out and about, encounter at least twenty people a day with a dementia of some type or other, at some stage of advancement. Just like persons with developmental disabilities, most people afflicted are perfectly capable of functioning in society; some with no help at all, others with varying degrees of assistance. If a person with dementia has difficulty handling emotions to the point of irrational anger, or some other manifestation that puts the person at risk, then he or she should be accompanied by a companion who knows the risks and helps the person avoid situations where it could become a problem. There are medications that help with behavioral manifestations as well as slowing (at times even improving) the cognitive decline.

These people, unless there is definite evidence that their behaviors are going to cause significant problems or will result in a definite danger to themselves or others, BELONG out in society. It helps them hang on to various skills, assists in combating depression, and helps keep them functional for as long as possible. If we're inconvenienced by that from time to time--so what? There, but for the grace of God, go any one of us.

AMEN and AMEN! And yes I am shouting. As a retired RN who spent30+ years working with Assisted Living and Memory Care Communities we are still so unenlightened regarding this devastating disease. This is the cruelest disease of all. Just ask families who have cared for a loved one until the end. Why is it the cruelest? Because you lose them twice.....once when they no longer recognize you and again when actual death comes. Patients and families deserve help in any way that we can assist. Even if it does "annoy" you or takes a tiny bit of your enjoyment away. Be kind..be patient....give another broken human being a chance to experience a little joy, even if it doesn't turn out that way. Thanks for reading.

[Taltarzac725]

Nicely put. We had a paid guide to deal with the health care system when my Dad was having problems back in 2020--Amy C.-- who compared dealing with Alzheimer's patients to the movie Fifty First Dates where the hero has to win the heroine over each date as if they had never met. 50 First Dates - Wikipedia

She was talking about how I should deal with my mother while my father was in Rehab or other places.

Originally Posted by yellowtownhouse

AMEN and AMEN! And yes I am shouting. As a retired RN who spent30+ years working with Assisted Living and Memory Care Communities we are still so unenlightened regarding this devastating disease. This is the cruelest disease of all. Just ask families who have cared for a loved one until the end. Why is it the cruelest? Because you lose them twice.....once when they no longer recognize you and again when actual death comes. Patients and families deserve help in any way that we can assist. Even if it does "annoy" you or takes a tiny bit of your enjoyment away. Be kind..be patient....give another broken human being a chance to experience a little joy, even if it doesn't turn out that way. Thanks for reading.

[PugMom]

Originally Posted by Holpat39

Not all dementia patients should be locked up in a facility and why shouldn't they be allowed to be out with a caregiver. Your post "what numbskull let them out in the first place" makes it sound like taking out the dog. Some of the loud mouth drunks in town square shouldn't be out in the streets since they create a disturbance. If you know a dementia person in a nursing home you would not want them to be there since so many facilities are short handed and the person will not get the care they need. I speak from experience dealing with a Parkinson patient. One week in a nursing home and I brought him back home. Minimal care where he was placed..

that's a big reason why i have my husband home. i don't trust anyone to do the job they way i would. such as bathing & fresh clothes every day, meals designed as brain food, & LOTS of patience