[Pairadocs]

Originally Posted by Aces4

I’d save the shame bit, people are entitled to their emotions when a good friend moves away. Losing a good friend to a distant move is like dealing with a death. You may cross paths again when visiting and FaceTime but the whole dynamic of the friendship has changed, there’s no more hanging out with together, socializing at functions…. it’s over.

I’d let your friends grieve and not blame it on jealously. You’re moving to Florida, not some exotic location.

Of all the replies, yours nails it ! Professional background in Psy perhaps ? Human emotions run wild in major "events", and definitely leaving one's friends and surroungings is a major life event. Jealously is usually the one most people theorize first, but you said it best, people ARE entitled to what they are feeling. Some just feel loss, it hurts because YES, you can stay "friends", and NO, the friendship will never be that same. It may last forever, there may be many visits exchanged and vacations, cruises, etc. planned as a means of continuing the friendship, but the day to day contact is different from the future relationship. People often feel betrayed, moving from a lifetime childhood home in particular, some may have the time and the money to move to Florida (or any other location) but they lack the courage...yes, for some it takes courage to change what they have always known, for others as you mentioned, deep family ties such as not being present on a regular basis for grand children, so many DEEP and very complex mix of emotions and motives. It's part of life, meeting, attaching, parting. I say to the poster, as you did, go forward and live YOUR life, do your best to keep in contact, exchange visits, and allow everyone (including yourself, as you too will feel sorry at parting) to experience their own emotions. Always realize the "departing" party usually recovers more quickly as that person is going into an exciting "new" adventure/life. Those "left" will generally suffer the longest and feel the loss deeper... in many ways similar to a divorce. The departing party generally feels loss no matter how destructive the relationship, but recovers more quickly; the person(s) "left" will almost always "suffer" the feelings of "emptiness" for a longer period.

[Djean1981]

Originally Posted by Love2Swim

Factcheck.org has an excellent article which talks about the various studies of restrictions and their effects on mortality rates and concluded that virtually all peer-reviewed research shows a mortality benefit from restrictions.

Lol

[Garywt]

You have to do what’s right for you. People do get upset and I am not sure why. Friends of ours actually lost friends when they said they were moving. They were told they were wrong, that they would hate it and many other things. We actually started visiting them in Florida and bought a house 3 years ago. Our cousins bought a little over a year ago and not of their kids have come to visit. They were upset that the family home was being sold. Hopefully they will visit soon. Hoping for the best for you and enjoy the Villages once you get here.

[mikempp]

Originally Posted by Michael 61

I’m just 9 days away from my move from Colorado until I close on my new home in TV. I’m a little surprised I am receiving some guilt trips (both passive and a few very direct) from long time close friends about leaving Colorado. There is a sense of betrayal and disloyalty I am receiving from more friends than I though I would. This is zapping a little bit of my joy and excitement of moving to the TV next week - although I knew they would be saddened (I am too), I thought they would be more supportive of my move, and of course I have a guest room for friends to visit, and will be flying back to Colorado a few times a year to visit them and spend Thanksgiving. Would like to hear any comments from those of you, and how you handled the move away from friends to TV.

Sounds to me like they will miss your company.

[donfey]

Originally Posted by Michael 61

I’m just 9 days away from my move from Colorado until I close on my new home in TV. I’m a little surprised I am receiving some guilt trips (both passive and a few very direct) from long time close friends about leaving Colorado. There is a sense of betrayal and disloyalty I am receiving from more friends than I though I would. This is zapping a little bit of my joy and excitement of moving to the TV next week - although I knew they would be saddened (I am too), I thought they would be more supportive of my move, and of course I have a guest room for friends to visit, and will be flying back to Colorado a few times a year to visit them and spend Thanksgiving. Would like to hear any comments from those of you, and how you handled the move away from friends to TV.

Why would "friends" treat you that way? You'll make many new friends here. Come on down!

[rustyp]

Originally Posted by Michael 61

Thank you for researching and taking the time and effort to attempt to contradict me. So much has happened in my journey in the last six months to get me to this point, changing my mind, exploring options, etc. I have now decided to make the plunge full time and sell in Colorado - since it appears you have taken a certain special interest in me, it may be better for you to send me personal IM’s if there is anything else you would like for me to clear up for you.

You are welcome. I'm waiting anxiously for your next question. As you have witnessed we are a community full of advice (quality ?). May I suggest the moment you arrive here in TV you enroll in Residents Academy. Before you ask read this:
VCDD Resident Academy

FYI - I believe it is "iM" not "IM" - iMessage developed by Apple. Shucks there I go again addicted to research and the quest for accuracy. It is a disease I developed after seeking medical insurance advice here on TOTV many moons ago.

[kenoc7]

Originally Posted by mrf0151

Moved from Colorado 17 years ago and all is good down here in TV. I don't think real friends would be doing this to you. Perhaps they are just jealous as you will not be freezing your behind of this year. Looking back, I see that Colorado is not what it used to be as it has become unaffordable for most. We won't even go into the politics. Welcome to FREE FLORIDA.

Florida is far from free if you want to read books or discuss gender identity or racial discrimination.

[Bogie Shooter]

Originally Posted by JMintzer

Yes, but you've since brought it up, several times...

Learned that from you …………….

[PugMom]

Originally Posted by Bogie Shooter

What does FREE FL mean?

it means we are happy with the decisions the state has made to promote a positive lifestyle for us all, with less regulations than some other places. we saw what life was like in Fl on the news, it was 1 of the major reasons we chose this state above all others.

[mikeycereal]

Originally Posted by The Chipster

It is probably because, in general, so many Americans believe the inhabitants of The Villages love Trump, DeSantis, the Jan. 6 rioters, etc. Of course this may not be true, but I live out of state, travel nationally extensively, and that is the overwhelming sentiment of most people I talk to. I am trying to not take sides or be political here, just speaking the truth.

Yeah but percentages favor one side, if not all. I myself do not latch on to either cult, and refrain from deep discussions because no one is going to sway another to their side in that sense. Takes a wacko website and news channel to do that.

[Rodneysblue]

Originally Posted by Michael 61

I’m just 9 days away from my move from Colorado until I close on my new home in TV. I’m a little surprised I am receiving some guilt trips (both passive and a few very direct) from long time close friends about leaving Colorado. There is a sense of betrayal and disloyalty I am receiving from more friends than I though I would. This is zapping a little bit of my joy and excitement of moving to the TV next week - although I knew they would be saddened (I am too), I thought they would be more supportive of my move, and of course I have a guest room for friends to visit, and will be flying back to Colorado a few times a year to visit them and spend Thanksgiving. Would like to hear any comments from those of you, and how you handled the move away from friends to TV.

Wow! So sorry to hear they were so negative towards you. Maybe they were not the friends you thought they were. When we told our friends we were moving they were very supportive. Although some were sad to see us leave but were happy for us and our new adventure. Don’t worry there will be many new friends to be gained once you settle in here.

[Taltarzac725]

About 90% of my experiences with Villagers have been good over the past 17 years. The worst stuff has been cyber bullying in various venues and these people could actually live just about anywhere. And I do know from their posts that they sometimes are people either still employed or tied to family members. They are waiting or were waiting to move to the Villages.

[Whitley]

Originally Posted by kenoc7

Florida is far from free if you want to read books or discuss gender identity or racial discrimination.

You are correct. Teachers can not discuss their pronouns, sexual preference and critical race theory with five year old kindergartners. Of course one may wonder why a 30something year old would want to discuss such things with little children. Very concerning.

[Whitley]

Originally Posted by The Chipster

It is probably because, in general, so many Americans believe the inhabitants of The Villages love Trump, DeSantis, the Jan. 6 rioters, etc. Of course this may not be true, but I live out of state, travel nationally extensively, and that is the overwhelming sentiment of most people I talk to. I am trying to not take sides or be political here, just speaking the truth.

Speaking the truth? Be careful with that insanity or you will be cancelled.

[Whitley]

Originally Posted by Stu from NYC

Has she ever been around those kind of people living here? Feel bad for your friend.

I feel badly for her husband.