[Shirleevee]

Originally Posted by Salvador

Hello.

Got a bit of a question.

How are homosexual couples received in The Villages?? Would people resent living next to one??? Would it catch a lot of attention?? You know....stares and ogles and whispers....would the good old fashioned folks not want to shake hands

To give you some background, my partner, a physician and golf nut, is reaching retirement age and we would like to relocate to Florida from the mid-west. However, after visiting the gay retirement havens of Ft. Lauderdale/South Beach/Miami Beach a couple times, we decided the culture there wasn't for us (very youth centric and superficial among other things).

We are discrete and conduct our lives conservatively (not Tuba players, so to speak) and don't necessarily seek out diversity--

--but would living in the Villages be pushing the envelope too far???

Any thoughts on how the straights (or breeders ) here feel about the issue??

PS.......be as honest or cruel as you want to be, because I would like to gauge the true sentiment of the community.

We have 'many' gay friends here. Their lifestyles are a non issue. You will be welcomed here by most. Even though you jest, I found the "breeders" remark offensive.

[Pats2010]

Originally Posted by Shirleevee

We have 'many' gay friends here. Their lifestyles are a non issue. You will be welcomed here by most. Even though you jest, I found the "breeders" remark offensive.

Yes, the "breeders" remark was originally intended as a derogatory word against hetro's. Don't know if it still has same meaning, though.

[grayesun]

Originally Posted by thistrucksforyou

Let me be the first here to be honest with you....Being gay isn't the issue ,it's will people in TV play with me, golf, cards, pickle ball, whatever....

I have visited TV twice a year for 4 years now and I have yet had one person ask me to play golf or go out to dinner...All people there is willing to give you is alot of lip service on how great it is there and how much there is to do, well unless you are in the click you are just another shopper ....The tour is a set up from the property owner...Special cards that are color coded so the buisness owners will know who you are...All the buisness people are prompted to wave at you as you ride by in the bus...Don't get me wrong, it is a great place to live with some good and bad people there...It will be the same there as anywhere else you may go....After saying that let ME BE THE FIRST to have you and your partner be my guest on the golf coarse or have dinner there, and I can show you around....At least I made the offer !

Just my thoughts

Sorry thistruck, but we've been living in TV for 8 months now and couldn't disagree more...we've been openly welcomed by all we've encountered, whether around the neighborhood, in town squares, at recreation facilities, on the golf courses and everywhere else. We're younger than most of the typical residents and thought we might not be readily accepted or feel awkward joining their group activities...we were so wrong. We play golf in a neighborhood scramble every Sunday afternoon, it's really a great time...playing 9 with a new couple each week then going in the clubhouse for dinner & socializing...doesn't get any better!
We also discovered that a fine way to meet new people to play golf with is to keep personal business sized info cards in your golf bag to hand out during a round to folks you're compatible with in golf skills or other interests; we've handed out a bunch, leading to many rounds with new friends at TV.
In summary - one should weigh thistrucks opinion of TV as a 2 week visitor against those of the full time residents and decide for yourself.
So thistruck, next time you're visiting TV let's play golf; let me be the 1st to invite you to play a round of golf. Please reply and we'll make the plans.

[grayesun]

Originally Posted by Russ_Boston

What? Hogwash!

Granted you may not have been asked to dinner etc. but perhaps that is your fault? Do you expect people to just stop you and say "Hey dude, how about joining our foursome tomorrow".? Go join a group as a single golfer. Do that day after day and I guarantee you that you'll make some new golfing friends. Go join in on any group (pickleball lessons, lap swimmers, card games, etc.) and talk with people - you'll make friends. Yes you have to put yourself out there but that is no different than any place.

I don't often get angry on this forum but for Salvatore's benefit please understand that this is an open forum and people can say anything they'd like to. Salvatore has taken the first step by posting on this board. I've made dozens of real friends over the past 3 years through TOTV. I meet with these friends for golf, bocce, shuffleboard, dinners, home parties, pickleball... every time I visit.

And I'll be there next week to pick out my home and interior choices, so let the fun begin.

Good luck with your new place in Buttonwood; you'll be a fine addition to the neighborhood.

[Shirleevee]

Here is a note from one of my gay friends:

Tell him that many of your gay friends have had children of their own, whether it be from a former relationship or adoption or any other number of ways and the “breeder” remark is just as offensive to us. If he wants to fit in anywhere in this country, he just needs to be himself. He is not going to have a sign put on his home with a big rainbow on it, saying GAY household, unless of course he puts it there himself.


People in the villages for the most part are kind, considerate and could careless whether someone is gay or not. There is a huge (over 1000 members) gay community here and they are welcoming to all! There are several churches in the community that are open to gay people as well. People are people, that is the bottom line.

[wilsonem]

I could care less what my neighbors do in the privacy of thier bedrooms.

[doubleujay1]

I did not mean to generalize conservatives. I know that not all conservatives are anti-gay . But saying that I do believe that conservatives in general are more apt to be religious and therefore believe that homosexuality is wrong. I apologize for generalizing because I don't like to do that and I didn't want it to be taken that way.

[grayesun]

Originally Posted by Shirleevee

Here is a note from one of my gay friends:

Tell him that many of your gay friends have had children of their own, whether it be from a former relationship or adoption or any other number of ways and the “breeder” remark is just as offensive to us. If he wants to fit in anywhere in this country, he just needs to be himself. He is not going to have a sign put on his home with a big rainbow on it, saying GAY household, unless of course he puts it there himself.


People in the villages for the most part are kind, considerate and could careless whether someone is gay or not. There is a huge (over 1000 members) gay community here and they are welcoming to all! There are several churches in the community that are open to gay people as well. People are people, that is the bottom line.

The use of the term breeder in this context got stuck in my craw as well; I found it offensive, heterophobic, condascending and inappropriate - so I spat it into the bathroom vessel, flushed and am now done with it. We're all humanity...a race of breeders; us, our parents and our children...and you too Salvador.

[Irish Rover]

Why not go to South Beach or Key West where you know you will be accepted. You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons. You wouldn't be asking this question if you weren't a bit worried. The Villages is a very conservative area, and if you read these posts regularly you'll find all is rosey until someone is actually confronted with a problem.
Think about it.

[redwitch]

Originally Posted by Irish Rover

Why not go to South Beach or Key West where you know you will be accepted. You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons. You wouldn't be asking this question if you weren't a bit worried. The Villages is a very conservative area, and if you read these posts regularly you'll find all is rosey until someone is actually confronted with a problem.
Think about it.

Sal already stated why he wasn't interested in Key West, South Beach or the myriad other gay communities. The reality is that the majority of TVers would accept Sal and his partner. There are some who won't. There are some who will give lip service to being accepting and then do their best to undermine those not "acceptable."

I do believe the majority of TOTVers will accept a gay couple -- as a group, they're younger than the majority presently residing in TV. However, as I stated previously, older members of TV have come to accept gays and other peoples they once felt were unacceptable -- mainly because of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

I did find Sal's use of "breeder" somewhst offensive but I've heard it enough from gay friends to leave it for a private conversation. But I truly resent Rover's comments that Sal and his partner would not be accepted because they are gay. I love Gracie but I don't wear her rose-colored glasses. I see the good and bad of TV. Non-acceptance of someone because of sexual orientation is not one of TV's foibles.

[Pats2010]

Originally Posted by redwitch

Sal already stated why he wasn't interested in Key West, South Beach or the myriad other gay communities. The reality is that the majority of TVers would accept Sal and his partner. There are some who won't. There are some who will give lip service to being accepting and then do their best to undermine those not "acceptable."

I do believe the majority of TOTVers will accept a gay couple -- as a group, they're younger than the majority presently residing in TV. However, as I stated previously, older members of TV have come to accept gays and other peoples they once felt were unacceptable -- mainly because of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

I did find Sal's use of "breeder" somewhst offensive but I've heard it enough from gay friends to leave it for a private conversation. But I truly resent Rover's comments that Sal and his partner would not be accepted because they are gay. I love Gracie but I don't wear her rose-colored glasses. I see the good and bad of TV. Non-acceptance of someone because of sexual orientation is not one of TV's foibles.

Sal did not say that. Please read him again. I think he was just trying to give this thread a little leverage as it seems that everybody is trying to out-liberal each other.
That being said, I would have no problem with it as I have a gay nephew who is accepted be everybody in our family.

[redwitch]

Um, I didn't say Sal said it. I said IRISH ROVER said it (or at least implied it).

[Russ_Boston]

Originally Posted by Irish Rover

You are getting all the politically correct responses on this site for obvious reasons.

Don't you dare tell me that my response was for some PC reason, my answer is genuine. I have friends both here in Mass and down in TV who are gay, straight, black, white, conservative, liberal and every tone in between.

Sal asked for your opinion and you gave it and I'll respect that. But don't ever tell someone else why you think I answered a question.

[Zoomie1955]

Originally Posted by scrapple

I am really glad to stumble on to this thread. My husband and I are moving down 10/1. We did a lifestyle preview. Our confusion comes into which village hosts which type of personality. We really want to live close to Salvador! Or at least in a fun, accepting neighborhood that does allow for political discussions and doesn't foster a "don't ask, don't tell" philosophy. We'll be renting for a few months until we find a place we want to settle down into. But how do we find that place? We're coming with our dog, would like a village that enjoys dog parties. We like neighbors that feel they can stop by to say hi without calling 1st. We like impromptu happy hours. We like music. We also recognize that strong fences make strong friendships and so are looking for a CYV. Any thoughts on how we find the right village for us? See you all soon! Carol and Dan.

Come live in my neighborhood!!!(Buttonwood in 2011.) You guys (that's my Pennsylvanian coming out)sound like you would be great neighbors!!!! Also, you too Salvator!!!

[Chi-Town]

Originally Posted by cashman

I am not sure why you mention that a lot of conservatives live in TV.

Conservatives have no problems with Gays. WE feel what they do is their business. I am a heterosexual and keep my sex life private between my wife and myself. I think most people feel that way; including Gays.

I agree that you cannot suggest that conservatives are anti-gay. Some of the staunchest conservatives such as Mark Foley, Ted Haggard, Larry Craig, Bob Allen, and Roy Ashburn are gay.