[Fraugoofy]

I love everyone's perspective on TOTV. I purposely do NOT go to a certain Village pool because it is too noisy with useless chatter. I enjoy quiet so I go to the pool one Village away and love it there! I have found people to be friendly and welcoming but I am sometimes the stand offish one. I do warm up eventually!!

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Sassafrass67

We have been visiting in laws for just about 10 years and purchased a vacation home 3 years ago here in TV. I have been reading Talk of the Villages for advice on restaurants, landscapers etc. The issue that concerns me is that being in our late 40s and early 50s we are not made to feel welcome by our fellow Villagers. We wave, which I thought was the polite thing to do in America's friendliest home town, just to be ignored. When we go to the pool we are basically ignored. We are not your stereotypical "problem" adult children living here. We add to the economy, we maintain our home and you won't find us being obnoxious town squares. What exactly are we not doing correctly.

Mutual Respect.
I think the title of your first post is not what you are explaining in your post. It does not appear that anyone is disrespectful to you. It appears you are disappointed that the other people are not acting friendly back, not waving back. The fact that you are ignored is simply because they don't know you . If you introduce yourself and find nothing in common than nothing comes of a friendship.. I don't see how you would conclude it is due to your age or due to their age..

So many people are new here, no one knows for sure who is newer unless you communicate that. They may think you are ignoring them.

[manaboutown]

Possibly TV has grown so much it may not have that small town ambience anymore, or at least as much as it once had. I grew up in and still spend a lot of time in a comparatively rural state. In the smaller towns people seem friendly, smile, wave and so on. In its largest city they behave more like big city folks anywhere in the world.

From what I have read age can be a factor in being accepted in 55 and over communities, especially for "trophy wives" who tend to not be made welcome. Since I am approximately the median age in TV I find its residents are quite friendly to me.

Within TV I have noticed some areas appear to have a greater percentage of older residents whereas others, especially the newer ones, comprise predominantly comparatively younger residents. If I were younger I imagine I might be happier in a newer section which would likely contain more peers within my age range.

[perrjojo]

We have a Very young new neighbor. She comes to the pool and has an amazing body. She is warm and friendly and is now a regular member of some of our regular groups. There is no age or body envy. She is fun to be with and the only thing I wonder is why she enjoys us "old ladies" so much.

[tippyclubb]

Originally Posted by Sassafrass67

We have been visiting in laws for just about 10 years and purchased a vacation home 3 years ago here in TV. I have been reading Talk of the Villages for advice on restaurants, landscapers etc. The issue that concerns me is that being in our late 40s and early 50s we are not made to feel welcome by our fellow Villagers. We wave, which I thought was the polite thing to do in America's friendliest home town, just to be ignored. When we go to the pool we are basically ignored. We are not your stereotypical "problem" adult children living here. We add to the economy, we maintain our home and you won't find us being obnoxious town squares. What exactly are we not doing correctly.

It takes time to make friends here, just like anywhere else. Keep smiling and being friendly and say hello to everyone. Some people will ignore you, but for those that don't that could be the start of a friendship. Get some calling cards made up and hand them to people you enjoyed talking with. We did that and had a few people call us to meet for dinner.

This forum is also a great way to meet people. If there's people on this forum you'd like to meet send them a private message asking to meet for lunch. I did this and made several good friends.

The monthly meet and greet at Chrispers is another good way to make friends. You should attend the next meeting in July. You will find a lot of friendly people there.

Don't get discouraged, keep being your friendly self and you will make friends in time. If you like we can set a day and meet for lunch. PM me if your interested.

[Villager Joyce]

There have now been two references to trophy wives on TOTV. Manaboutown Said they tend not to be made welcome. Why would we know or care unless ....

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Villager Joyce

There have now been two references to trophy wives on TOTV. Manaboutown Said they tend not to be made welcome. Why would we know or care unless ....

Sweetie is a trophy husband.

[Villager Joyce]

My husband prefers to be thought of as a "boy toy"!

[Blessed2BNTV]

Originally Posted by graciegirl

Sweetie is a trophy husband.

Hey I have one of those too!

[asianthree]

Our oldest son came for a visit and found some just plain grumpy to him. He realized then that their first question was are you looking to buy, and you know you can't bring you kids with you.

He would smile and say I am a doctor looking for a vacation home that I can play golf and enjoy spending time with my dad. And yep I am bringing my kids here for the whole summer. (And no he never said they only have golden fur babies.). But he said the looks were priceless

[Greg Dion]

My wife and I are also in the 40 and 50's group and I agree there are people who don't smile and wave, but I would bet they didn't smile and wave wherever they came from. We have never had an issue with anyone treating us differently because we are younger, in fact, most of the time, we are welcomed even more. Just try and put yourself out there and try and to be extra friendly, it will pay off!!!! There are so many GREAT people here!!

[Sassafrass67]

i can kind of understand not wanting to trust right off the bat, however we chose to purchase a home in the Villages in large part because we appreciate the standards, quality of life and the safe community. That is really why I named the first post mutual respect. My grandparents raised me so I have a huge amount of respect for my elders. We smile, hold doors open and obey the rules here, it would be nice if some of the less trusting Villagers could just give new people a chance. I am sure we can make friends here, already have with neighbors. I understand cliques, it's part of life, raised two sons to treat others the way they wanted to be treated, you know, the "Golden Rule". YES, there are very nice Villagers, I just did not understand the Cranks. We will try to be here for a Crispers meeting and yes we do plan on having new friends over for wine and snacks.........just as soon as the driveway and lanai has cured so we can get patio furniture out of our living room!

[CathyandSteveG]

I guess i look at it a bit differently. My husband and i have lived in our home 24 years....we have NEVER spoken to our next door neighbors.

I am not moving to the villages to make friends...I am moving to the villages to enjoy the rest of my life with the man i love.

I am a very friendly person...and if you want to speak to me or wave to me...I will absolutley be friendly to you....but if none of you ever speak to me...oh well.

I will go to the pool with my husband...i will go out to eat with him....i will drive around and enjoy my life with him.

I quite frankly am not worried about making friends...i will be with my best friend and i cannot wait to enjoy retirement with him.

For those who have issues with younger or more beautiful ladies...trophy wives....how petty and ridiculous. I am what i am....i am not trying to impress anyone else....and if you dont like me oh well....your loss.

Life is too short to worry about crap like this....

[sunnyatlast]

Originally Posted by CathyandSteveG

I guess i look at it a bit differently. My husband and i have lived in our home 24 years....we have NEVER spoken to our next door neighbors.

I am not moving to the villages to make friends...I am moving to the villages to enjoy the rest of my life with the man i love.

I am a very friendly person...and if you want to speak to me or wave to me...I will absolutley be friendly to you....but if none of you ever speak to me...oh well.

I will go to the pool with my husband...i will go out to eat with him....i will drive around and enjoy my life with him.

I quite frankly am not worried about making friends...i will be with my best friend and i cannot wait to enjoy retirement with him.

For those who have issues with younger or more beautiful ladies...trophy wives....how petty and ridiculous. I am what i am....i am not trying to impress anyone else....and if you dont like me oh well....your loss.

Life is too short to worry about crap like this....

Amazing.

[graciegirl]

If you want friends you can find them here.

If you don't want friends, well that is hard to understand, and this isn't the best place, because people will try to befriend you.

People of all ages and all kinds of personalities live here. You get out of life what you put into it most times.

I think most people move here because it is an over 55 retirement community for active older adults. No one should be mad at us because that comprises the majority of people. If someone is fixated on youth and beauty, usually that means they are somewhat immature. People can be immature at any age. People drift toward people with like values but respecting everyone seems to be a very strong value here.

I would not move to a college town and wonder why people weren't wanting to pal around with me. I would get to know them one person at a time and soon they would find how much we have in common.

None of us have ever been this age before and we are learning as we go along.

May we all live here for a thousand years and find joy and peace and laughter.