[TrudyM]

My husband and I where talking last night about identity and self worth etc.
All our lives he has been the Hawaiian aerospace engineer and I have been the workaholic retail exec.
Who are we when we no longer work.
He loves golf but will it get old?
As witnessed by how often I am here on this site, I haven’t found not working (all be it not by choice) as great as I thought it would be. All the stuff I never had time for doesn't seem that interesting anymore.

Don't mean to be a downer just wondered.

Any of you have trouble with the transition.

[k2at]

I have had the same discussions with my wife. I realize we all worked our whole lives and now "it is time to reap the harvest", however both my wife and I are of the opinion that there is something wrong with taking and giving nothing back. Maybe if I start volunteering my services somewhere I can shake this feeling.

There has to be more to the rest of our lives other than pickleball in the AM, golf in the mid-afternoon, and the town squares in the PM.

Am I a sick pup or what?

[Sandy222]

This is the adjustment to retirement that no one warned us about. Never did I realize how much my job was my identity. Now we become the greatest procrastinators ..theres just no motivation to get anything done. Now the next phase ----- can you get tired of too much fun. I guess this is when the volunteering or going back to work thoughts start running through our head. Glad to hear that there are others struggling with this. Don't get me wrong I love the Villages and all the fun things it has to offer. Maybe there should be an "Adjustment to Retirement" support group.

[BobKat1]

I must be a slug! I worked for the same (national) company for 33 years and was more than ready to retire. It's been 5 years on July 30th and I've enjoyed every minute of it.

Seriously though, I know many co-workers who didn't adjust right away, I think it varies by person and their personality/outlook. The people I know, eventually settled into "the life". Good luck to everyone who posted here. IMO, retirement is a great time of life to be enjoyed.

[Barefoot]

Interesting topic. I have retired friends who feel useless and without purpose as retirees. Their identities were so entrenched with their jobs. They feel now that they are on "the slag pit of life". My husband, a Fire Captain, is still employed and unwilling to set a retirement date. He loves his job.

I worked for 40 years and have embraced my "golden years" without a ripple. I truly feel these are the most enjoyable years of my life.

[njbchbum]

I will celebrate my one year anniversary of retirement in just a few days - and I have LOVED, LOVED, LOVED every minute so far!

13 yrs ago my husband and I purchased a vacation home in Maine - which we could only enjoy on vacations from work - now we can go whenever we want to endure a 7/8 hour drive - and we do.

6 yrs ago my husband had hip replacement surgery - so we had an above ground 15 X 30 pool installed for his workouts pre- and post-op. We added a heater, ground level deck and an 8 X 10 shed that we turned it into a cabana. With a little bit of landscaping we have a backyard oasis to enjoy.

3 yrs ago we bought into the Disney Vacation Club so we could travel to Orlando and Hilton Head Island every winter - now we go whenever the spirit moves us and reservations are available!

This past March we went to WDW and then visited our friends in TV en route back to NJ - we wound up buying a 2br/2ba in Silver Lake while we were visiting! What a souvenier to bring home!

I still awaken at 5:30 a.m. like the days when I was employed - but now I laugh my butt off and go back for 40 winks. I enjoy my morning paper and coffee on my screen porch, I plan what to cook for dinner, and I set about doing whatever chores must be attended to. In the evening or during a rainy day I crochet afghans which I donate to charitable organizations or give as gifts as the events arise. Occasionally we girls get together for a movie nite and my husband gathers with the guys for a cigar nite. We dine out on Saturdays and sometimes get in a round of miniature golf after dinner.

There's no golf or pickle ball in our lives right now - but maybe there will be in the future...that would mean we will have to plan for lessons in those sports - maybe we'll take up shuffleboard and/or bocce.

We could not be enjoying these things if we had not started to plan some 30 years ago. One day we realized that we were making good money and had nothing to show for it. So we went on a crash course to start saving, we invested tax returns and financial gifts, and we talked about the things we wanted to do that we could not do while we were working. So much more has come about than we ever thought possible. Never did we even come close to imagining that we would own 2 vacation homes!

I think that the transition from employee to retiree has to start a good number of years before anyone's retirement date. But for those who did not plan that way, I would suggest that it is never too late to start the planning process. Make a list [I still shudder at those words because of how often my Father said them to me!] of all the things you like to do and then make a plan on how to accomplish them. And as for volunteering - don't let it take over your life! It can too easily become a substitute for employment - and you already did that!

Don't ask yourselves 'why should I/we' - ask yourselves 'why shouldn't I/we'! There is rarely a reason not to..................!

[nONIE]

Trudy,
Very thought provoking topic! are you living in "The Villages" or just contemplating a move there????

[ijusluvit]

The "Adjustment to Retirement" support group is a waste of time. The group these folks need to form is "Share What You're Doing".

There is one simple fact about life after work. MOVE on. DO other things.

I can't think of any reason, except major health problems, why a retired person can't do enough things to stave off sheer boredom. We have all dreamed of the day when we would be free of the daily grind. It is a shock to wake up on the day it happens. But by that first afternoon we have to begin moving toward some new goals, frivolous, and profound. Boredom is a prelude to death, and it should be our wakeup call. Fortunately, life is still a challenge even when everything we think we need is taken care of with the monthly electronic deposit to our savings account. Take a look at your world. What are your challenges? Meet them.
Luckily, TV has more opportunities to DO than many other places. Volunteering is not only noble, but there are an almost inexhaustible number of ways we can get involved. Go out and play, make new friends, etc. We don't have to confine ourselves to central Florida, we are connected to the whole world. Just DOING can not only contribute to others but it is the means by which we can achieve personal fulfillment and happiness. Allowing ourselves to sit and become bored can only erode the chance to be fulfilled and happy.

geeez, I got going there for a minute. ok, I yield to the chair.

[tpop1]

I guess I was lucky, as I never really defined myself mainly by what I did for a living.

I thoroughly enjoyed my work as a Computer System manager, by I also enjoyed and was defined by my role as a father, a Little League Coach, a small town politician, a poor golfer, a beach goer, a small boater, a skier, etc.

One of the reasons we chose TV can be found at the link to the Recreation Newsletter .........http://www.thevillagesdailysun.com/c...ns/recnews.pdf

To paraphrase the words of a not so famous philosopher I ran into in Virginia Beach more than 40 years ago, “If you can’t get turned on here, you have no switches.” If you can’t find things to do here, that will make you happy EVERY DAY, you have no switches!”

Forget about work and find your passion!

There’s a big wide world of things to get passionate about here in TV…..

There’s groups covering sports, cards and games, physical activities, arts, dance & music, community activities, geographical background, ethnicity, health builders, support organizations, religious studies, technology support, knitting, sewing & quilting, intellectual activities, cars & motorcycles, volunteer services, and more.

I for one don’t know how I’ll find the time to do everything I would like to try once I get to The Villages.

[TrudyM]

Originally Posted by nONIE

Trudy,
Very thought provoking topic! are you living in "The Villages" or just contemplating a move there????

Not in TV yet. Just trying to come up with a plan, worked in a planning dept. so it comes natural.

We are 23 months from my husbands retirement given the realestate market turns around, we sunk allot of money in this house as a fix it upper with a city view, and if things had not gone south would have made a nice piece of change as it is we may or may not make anything. I was working in the Macys regional buying office which closed in May of 2008. So I hadn't planned to be not working.

[nONIE]

Originally Posted by tpop1

I guess I was lucky, as I never really defined myself mainly by what I did for a living.

I thoroughly enjoyed my work as a Computer System manager, by I also enjoyed and was defined by my role as a father, a Little League Coach, a small town politician, a poor golfer, a beach goer, a small boater, a skier, etc.

One of the reasons we chose TV can be found at the link to the Recreation Newsletter .........http://www.thevillagesdailysun.com/c...ns/recnews.pdf

To paraphrase the words of a not so famous philosopher I ran into in Virginia Beach more than 40 years ago, “If you can’t get turned on here, you have no switches.” If you can’t find things to do here, that will make you happy EVERY DAY, you have no switches!”

Forget about work and find your passion!

There’s a big wide world of things to get passionate about here in TV…..

There’s groups covering sports, cards and games, physical activities, arts, dance & music, community activities, geographical background, ethnicity, health builders, support organizations, religious studies, technology support, knitting, sewing & quilting, intellectual activities, cars & motorcycles, volunteer services, and more.

I for one don’t know how I’ll find the time to do everything I would like to try once I get to The Villages.

TPop1 has said it all. I guarantee that once you move to "The Villages" Your memories of working will fade so far in the past you wont even have time to think about "working"

There is an assortment of diverse activities to stimulate your mind and body, whatever your interest, TV has it all. Friends are made easily and before you know it you will be so involved you wont know how to fit it all in.

Being in The Villages is like being on a permanent vacation. I realize that everyone handles retirement differently but Ill just bet that you will be loving life once you move down. TV is magical!

[gardenia]

How timely. I recently returned to my home in NJ after a 2 wk trip to TV, and 9 months of "transition" after losing my job of 25 years in Information Technology management. Some of the questions I wanted answers to were "what might it be like on a day to day basis living in TV and not going to work", how will I "feel" in TV vs NJ"? And the few days I've been back, I began to get my answers. In TV, I see lots of "energy". I got up and ran before 8 every morning on Sumter Landing boardwalk or in the Santiago Village, and so many others were already out walking, running, already on the golf course or playing pickleball. Compare that to folks in NJ: driving by in their cars off to work, little kids accompanied by their parents going to school, no sign of "fun" or any one that appears to be in the same position I am in. Being in TV, it was apparent that most folks are pretty much in the same "place of our lives" and appear to have a much deeper sense of community and comraderie than living in a community where everyone work or have young kids in school. As for what I would do, I popped into the bead store in SL while I was there and just walked into a beading class and loved it, so now I am interested in learning more about jewelry design. I have always had an interest in mosaic crafts but never pursued it, figured I could find a place to learn that when I move to TV next year. Now, I am not artistic at all, but that's what I envision myself doing, finding interests and pursuing them. Loved the idea of visiting Disney, silly me, hadn't thought of that! I know that I will want to visit my kids in the NJ/DC area and figure rental of extended stay facilities up north for a month each year might be an option, to break up the day to day life in TV. I am amazed at how neighborly folks were in Santiago, iniitiating friendships, initiating bike rides, offering gardening advice which I have never seen in neither NY or NJ. Oh, last thing, I just bought a book entitled "The Healing Journey through retirement" which I first got from the library and thought it was such a great book for journaling the transition to retirement that I had to buy it. So, that's my answer to how to prepare for retirement, works great for me!

[BUC]

I plan on moving to TV in a couple of years. My wife will retire from the school system, I hope to be able to continue to work. My Company has a big presents in Flordia, our corp. headquarters is in Tampa, but we have offices all over the state. I sure you have seen our trucks managing road construction projects. I've already spoken with shirt and tie guys about a transfer and they are agreeable, when the road project I'm currently working is completed 12/31/10, If I end of driving a couple of hours to whatever project I'll be working will be fine I'm use to it, Company truck with gas card. I may not work the hours that I do now 60+ per week, and I try to take a vacation each year, but I can't see myself as a Walmart greeter ( nothing wrong with that but not for me). It's really not about money, I really enjoy managing construction projects, mainly Roads and bridges. That's just my opinion I want my wife to be able to enjoy all the TV has to offer!

[ijusluvit]

Originally Posted by gardenia

How timely. I recently returned to my home in NJ after a 2 wk trip to TV, and 9 months of "transition" after losing my job of 25 years in Information Technology management. Some of the questions I wanted answers to were "what might it be like on a day to day basis living in TV and not going to work", how will I "feel" in TV vs NJ"? And the few days I've been back, I began to get my answers. In TV, I see lots of "energy". I got up and ran before 8 every morning on Sumter Landing boardwalk or in the Santiago Village, and so many others were already out walking, running, already on the golf course or playing pickleball. Compare that to folks in NJ: driving by in their cars off to work, little kids accompanied by their parents going to school, no sign of "fun" or any one that appears to be in the same position I am in. Being in TV, it was apparent that most folks are pretty much in the same "place of our lives" and appear to have a much deeper sense of community and comraderie than living in a community where everyone work or have young kids in school. As for what I would do, I popped into the bead store in SL while I was there and just walked into a beading class and loved it, so now I am interested in learning more about jewelry design. I have always had an interest in mosaic crafts but never pursued it, figured I could find a place to learn that when I move to TV next year. Now, I am not artistic at all, but that's what I envision myself doing, finding interests and pursuing them. Loved the idea of visiting Disney, silly me, hadn't thought of that! I know that I will want to visit my kids in the NJ/DC area and figure rental of extended stay facilities up north for a month each year might be an option, to break up the day to day life in TV. I am amazed at how neighborly folks were in Santiago, iniitiating friendships, initiating bike rides, offering gardening advice which I have never seen in neither NY or NJ. Oh, last thing, I just bought a book entitled "The Healing Journey through retirement" which I first got from the library and thought it was such a great book for journaling the transition to retirement that I had to buy it. So, that's my answer to how to prepare for retirement, works great for me!

Wow, now that's the spirit!!! You will always fit right in here because what you saw in your visit is "the way it is" everywhere in TV. And it AIN'T NJ!!!!

[rshoffer]

We moved to TV a little over a year ago. We came down on the 'lifestyle package', liked what we saw and decided to add a new chapter to our lives. There was one stipilation: I did not want to stop 'working' but I did want to slow down. I was able to join a practice here and go from 5 1/2 days a week to my current 4 days a week. After doing this for the past year I feel that 3 days a week would be ideal. I have prepared my wife for the reality that I could never see myself working less than 2 days a week.