[janmcn]

Things are already changing across the country. Guns are being pulled from shelves, gun shows are being canceled, violent movies are not opening, songs about 'dying young' are not being played, private equity firms are selling their positions in gun manufacturers. There are many ways people are fighting back against this kind of violence.

[2BNTV]

Originally Posted by janmcn

Things are already changing across the country. Guns are being pulled from shelves, gun shows are being canceled, violent movies are not opening, songs about 'dying young' are not being played, private equity firms are selling their positions in gun manufacturers. There are many ways people are fighting back against this kind of violence.

From everything I'm reading, this is true.

There is a big outcry across the nation to bring violence into to some form of control. We have to do something to prevent these type of tradgedy's.

If we do nothing but say that's not going to solve the problem then we are asking for it to be repeated again and again.

So many funerals at a time when people should be happy about the holiday's.

[eweissenbach]

Originally Posted by 2BNTV

From everything I'm reading, this is true.

There is a big outcry across the nation to bring violence into to some form of control. We have to do something to prevent these type of tradgedy's.

If we do nothing but say that's not going to solve the problem then we are asking for it to be repeated again and again.

So many funerals at a time when people should be happy about the holiday's.

I think the mood of the masses is such that some gun regulation will be addressed, even people like Joe Scarborough, and others with high grades from the NRA are inclined to do something. I fear that it will be too little, too late, but I suppose any move in the right direction is a move in the right direction. Whether anything will be done, either by regulation, or voluntarily by producers of violence in movies, video games and music, is less likely IMO. Also expect some mental health issues to be addressed. A shame that any solutions will be too late for twenty 6-7 year old children and their families. If nothing else, this tragedy may cause many parents to rethink their permissive behavior with their children, and try to pass along some ethics and values. Not all will be so moved, sadly.

[buggyone]

Originally Posted by Cantwaittoarrive

I agree 100% with the above statement. You don't fix that by limiting freedoms you fix that by getting back to family values, morals and respect.

Remember that when the Constitution was written, there were only single shot firearms. The "freedom to bear arms" had an entirely different meaning than with an AR-15 with twin banana magazines taped back to back.

I would really like to know what the poster means precisely by "family values" as it can mean lots of things to different people. Is it the traditional family of Beaver Cleaver having dinner together with Wally and The Beav scared that Dad is going to yell at them or hit them?

[senior citizen]

Everone's thoughts are valuable. When we were raising our children and right after they both "left home" we were told that we had the typical "Leave it to Beaver" type household. This was said by an activity assistant who would bring my elderly mom back to me each day from adult daycare.........he'd visit awhile; we'd invite him to dinner. He was a nice young man; came from a broken home. Everyone sees what a family should be in a different way, based on their frame of reference. When our kids got to be juniors in college, they both thanked us for staying together and having a good family life for them. At that age of 20, they realized, after seeing all the broken homes of some of their friends..........we always ate our meals together in the kitchen....we always went on vacations together and we always were with them each evening, and knew what they watched on television..........so many kids are left alone nowadays with either daycare providers or babysitters.......so they can watch whatever they choose to on t.v.......whether it be violent or not.

When our grandkids were visiting for the long Thanksgiving weekend, they spotted the new Wii games I had purchased for them from amazon.com........such as "INDIANA JONES", "HARRY POTTER".......and on and on........all popular with the elementary school set............originally, I had bought the Wii console a few years ago for my husband (to do the Sports Fitness videos which our adult kids had brought home with them one other visit.......and all seemed to enjoy the exercises; he never used it).........anyway, the machine sits there.

The 8 year old and 11 year old found segments within segments of the Indiana Jones and Harry Potter, etc. wii challenges......that I thought were a little "INTENSE" to say the least.........but they were mesmerized. That's a good word. I can only imagine what teens in these gaming parlors or on the internet "might" get hooked into.

We were superivising ours and called it quits after a spell......

Wii also has dance video games as well as all the exercise and other wii games that are fine............but I can see where video games, as kids get older, might impact on them, esp. if they see really violent ones which turn normal kids into killing machines.

It's a complicated matter involving guns in the wrong hands, violent media and games, plus psychotropic drugs given to kids, which may or may not alter the brain chemistry in a bad way.......look up the facts for Ritilin given to school aged children labeled as hyperactive or A.D.H.D. which is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

Scary.

We all watched shoot em outs with cowboy t.v. shows, etc........and I can't think of one child or teen murderer from our childhood neighborhood or city.......again, it is complicated...........however, family morals were different back then. No one really preached to us.........we just seemed to KNOW "right from wrong"......go figure.

Another thing I marvel at is that we, as children, walked all over the city into various kinds of "bad" neghborhoods, even in New York City.........and no one ever abducted us..........my husband thinks that back then they had the fear of the law in them.

I don't have an answer.........but times have changed for parents and grandparents alike. Our children also had the freedom to roam, to walk back and forth from school if they wished.......to play in the woods, to walk on the pine trail.....and I never worried.............nowadays, I wouldn't allow it.....as other young parents do not allow it. There are too many questionable type folks out there.

[graciegirl]

When I was in school it was taught that all human behavior could be changed and modified and that children were born as " blank slates". Now much has been learned that certain tendencies and personalities are born with us and can be modified to some degree but there isn't an answer or a solution to all behavior problems and all mental illnesses.

I am worried that the kids in this country who have Asbergers will now have the additional burden of having people fear them when in almost all cases these people are not in anyway a threat to society.

Some mental illnesses are caused by environment, stress,traumatic events and lack of nurture, but most are either genetic or are caused by an imbalance in brain chemistry or brain configuration. We can't let what we see in the movies guide our understanding of mental illness. There are those people with mental illness are a threat to their family and to society and there is no place where they can be safely placed and that is a huge problem. I have read things that said we need to report behaviors but until someone acts or makes a threat it does not become criminal behavior.

There just isn't any pat or easy answer. I cannot think of a single one.

[shcisamax]

Our kids spent their first 8 years in Mexico. I have a very good friend who is a psychologist. When she came to visit, she was amazed how able the kids were able to play independently and find something to do rather than be scheduled to do something. They had no video games. I think they watched Pokomon on TV when it finally hit Mexico. When we returned, all the boys in our area had video games and I was caught in this constant battle with my son about why we didn't have all those games. It was apparent, the parents were in total denial. I found myself asking before a "playdate" (I didn't even know what a play date was) what will they be doing? If the answer was, or my son later told me, video games were part of the experience, I limited his time at that house in the future. It became very difficult because literally ALL the boys were playing video games. I finally broke down and bought the player and a couple games but NEVER ones with violence. I don't know how anyone can't see that watching and participating in violence for play is the most stupid thing you can allow your child to do. And I am not talking about cowboys and indians so please don't draw that correlation. It simply doesn't meet the gory standard that the video games present. Does life imitate art or does art imitate life? I think at this point, we can safely say that while art can imitate life, in these cases, life imitates art. They didn't think up this stuff on their own.

[shcisamax]

I agree with Gracie. This is not a one solution answer. There are many pieces of the puzzle. Mental health has to be looked at, environment has to be looked at, the societal culture has to be looked at. Types of guns released to the general population has to be looked at. None of this will get fixed overnight.

[senior citizen]

Originally Posted by shcisamax

Our kids spent their first 8 years in Mexico. I have a very good friend who is a psychologist. When she came to visit, she was amazed how able the kids were able to play independently and find something to do rather than be scheduled to do something. They had no video games. I think they watched Pokomon on TV when it finally hit Mexico. When we returned, all the boys in our area had video games and I was caught in this constant battle with my son about why we didn't have all those games. It was apparent, the parents were in total denial. I found myself asking before a "playdate" (I didn't even know what a play date was) what will they be doing? If the answer was, or my son later told me, video games were part of the experience, I limited his time at that house in the future. It became very difficult because literally ALL the boys were playing video games. I finally broke down and bought the player and a couple games but NEVER ones with violence. I don't know how anyone can't see that watching and participating in violence for play is the most stupid thing you can allow your child to do. And I am not talking about cowboys and indians so please don't draw that correlation. It simply doesn't meet the gory standard that the video games present. Does life imitate art or does art imitate life? I think at this point, we can safely say that while art can imitate life, in these cases, life imitates art. They didn't think up this stuff on their own.

I "hear you". Our daughter and her husband (ditto for our son and his wife) rarely, if ever, watch television.......the older children are kept so busy between school activities, sports, community and church activities and just "playing in the great outdoors".....swimming, kayaking, ice skating, skiing, mountain biking, climbing, you name it....they are OUTDOORS doing it..........when they were really little, they only watched a few selected shows on public television or old reruns of Little House on the Prairie, The Waltons, etc.........our other grandchildren are babies so again, they are not exposed to violence at all.

But, you are correct in your observations.........

p.s. The reason I purchased the stack of Wii games from Amazon, was for some "down time" while they were visiting and they did come in handy on a rainy day.
But in very limited amounts. Grandson had loved all the Indiana Jones leggo sets we got him and they all read the entire series of Harry Potter books...........
Not to mention, the "cartoonish" characters on the Wii boxes didn't hint at the intensity within the game......once one got to various levels. Still they were for kids.

[ugotme]

Unfortunately today there is basically NO social inter-action.
Without sounding like an old fuddy-duddy, growing up we were always outside with our friends. playing whatever games you played in your area. But, we interacted with each other - sometimes laughing sometimes arguing. We "saw" each other and talked to each other.

Today, most kids are cooped up looking at a television - whether it be a program or a video game. When they are bored with that they take out their cell phones and either play another game or text each other. You can not develop social skills through a phone! Life isn't about if you disagree with someone - you hang up!

What to do? I don't know!!!! There is a lot of peer pressure and a lot of "parent pressure" to help kids "fit in." I would love to see kids outside playing but I believe, for the most part, those days are long gone!

[senior citizen]

Originally Posted by ugotme

Unfortunately today there is basically NO social inter-action.
Without sounding like an old fuddy-duddy, growing up we were always outside with our friends. playing whatever games you played in your area. But, we interacted with each other - sometimes laughing sometimes arguing. We "saw" each other and talked to each other.

Today, most kids are cooped up looking at a television - whether it be a program or a video game. When they are bored with that they take out their cell phones and either play another game or text each other. You can not develop social skills through a phone! Life isn't about if you disagree with someone - you hang up!

What to do? I don't know!!!! There is a lot of peer pressure and a lot of "parent pressure" to help kids "fit in." I would love to see kids outside playing but I believe, for the most part, those days are long gone!

Our daughter and son in law keep their kids so busy with extracurricular activities (as mentioned above in another post) it tires me just to think about it......but they have thrived on all the interaction with their peers in school, church, community and adults in their lives.......I don't think she ever lets them sit still......they are always doing something educational or "athletic"........but that's just her style..... Living in a rural area, she feels she has to keep them involved or perhaps they would be glued to the t.v.

When we were kids, we were just like you mention above........out playing all the time. The one or two shows we watched were those such as "Superman" or one on Saturday I remember, "Ramar of the Jungle" and then we'd go out and play all day.

Our kids were born in 1968 and 1971 and also played out all the time , even in the winter time.

When I, myself, noticed the change was when new neighbors with ten year "younger" children moved in. They were driven everywhere, whereas our kids walked to their friends' homes, walked to school and back up the hills or walked to the library and movie theatre in town, etc.
just as we used to do.

The new parents also did allow a lot of video game watching and basically kept the kids "close" to home. They turned out just fine, but I did notice a difference in that they didn't play outside during all four seasons such as ours did. Actually, I think our kids and their friends' generation were the last to play out all day such as you and I did. They are now 44 and 41.

Times did change since I was a kid, that's for sure. We were raised in the 1950's.....born in 1945.

I always say to my husband that he and I can watch a show like DEXTER and obviously we are NOT going to go and stab someone to death.....however, there is an entire generation of kids , home alone, watching all the cable network has to offer.......and then some.

My dad would put on BONANZA or some such show, which wasn't violent and he controlled the t.v. knob; there were no remotes back then.

Nowadays, all of the violent t.v. shows probably would very insidiously creep into kids' psyche.....not necessarily cause ALL OF THEM to act on what they see.......but who knows, in a slightly unbalanced mind, what might happen??? Or, since they see so much of it, maybe it wouldn't phase them one iota.

But for the good news, most of the young parents I know, which are friends of our adult children and old neighbors' children plus our young neices and nephews, DO NOT allow their children to watch much t.v. at all........so there is a parental control of sorts happening........at least with the young parents we know.

But, I know exactly what you mean.........

[shcisamax]

Maybe the pendulum is done swinging in that direction. Decided not to say swinging to the left or the right because it would cause another can of worms

[2BNTV]

I see the problem as being three prongged:
1. Ban all weapons of mass destruction as only law enforcement and military should have them.
2. Mental health isues need to be funded and addressed.
3. Violence in our culture needs to be toned down.

I will only address the last issue as I expounded on various threads on the other two points of contention. Today's children need to play more with their imaginations and with learning type toys. They need to be more activities with other children as oppossed to sitting in front of a computer whether hand held etc......

I wish the children of today had the days when we were thrown outside to play in the street as I remember we were always busy playing stickball, ring a levio and other games. We were safe in the neighborhood as the neighbors looked out for us. I think everyone our age misses those day as today's kids need to be entertained from the moment they open their eyes to the time they go to sleep with video games. It's a different world for sure as they need to be watched less something bad will happen to them.

I agree with ugotme in that their social interaction with their peers leaves a lot to be desired. I remember a story when a mother took her adult daughter to lunch and the daughter played with a hand held device throughout dinner instead of interacting with her mother. How sad........

[buggyone]

This is all good stuff and makes sense. However, most here are talking of a family unit where there is a mother and father. Father works and mother stays home preparing meals and cleaning house.

Would you want your daughter to be one of those housewifes who stay home or be a vibrant part of the workforce equal to that of any man? Choices are made according to each person.

How many of us in the Boomer generation (born around 1945-1955) had a mother who worked as an attorney, CEO, or a profession that required her to be equal to any man? If mothers worked, it was a store clerk, secretary, nurse, or teacher.

[Russ_Boston]

Admin - ?

Why does this thread not constitute political discussion? Which is banned on this forum.

We all are saddened by the tragedy last week. But political discussion on this thread about legislation, gun control, censorship etc. will not help and will only divide the many great posters of this site.

IMHO - Please close this thread.

Respectfully,
Russ