[Yorio]

I have to chill out and as a therapy I am writing this post, hoping that future movers to TV can learn from what we did. I have learned that a move is more psychological than physical both for my partner as well as for me. More for my partner perhaps because she is still reluctant to make the move though she had finally agreed. I am sure those who made that big jump will agree with me. If I have psychological stress, I can't imagine what she is going through. Though I have spent overseas on several occasions, we've never sold our house so there is indeed a 36 years of accumulation plus what my late brother left behind and never came back to pick up. My wife is a hoarder of our son's things from birth to when he got married. Where do we start? At least we already have a place in TV so that's a relief but our house in TV is about a third of our current home. This sudden move started end of June. We were thinking about the move sometime late next year but when we queried few of the real estate agent, they recommended that the timing is now. Currently the house inventory is very low and with the interest having gone up, house sales have picked up. Besides for families with young children, the time is now. We have a very good elementary school within short walking distance. We sold the house in 10 days. Fifth couple who came to see the house liked it and made an offer. That was great but the downside was that we have to move within six weeks. We did have the intention of moving eventually so we did start to clear up few things but we realize now it was just a surface attempt. The first major stressful event since retirement.

[casita37]

May I suggest professional help!! NO....I'm not suggesting a psychiatrist..LOL

Congratulations on a quick sale and welcome to TV. What I meant by pro help is an "organizer" or whatever they are called in your area. You can probably check your local paper, or ask around, for someone who will help make those tough decisions about what to keep and what to give away, throw out or donate. The pro will have no emotional attachment and can help you ease away from yours.

Just a thought, but with 36 years of accumulation....WOW...I'm sure we would all be a bit overwhelmed. Best of luck!!

[graciegirl]

There is no one who can throw it out but you. It is horribly hard to get rid of things.

Try to remember this.

It will be easier for YOU to do it than your children.

It feels better somehow to give things to a charity, after you try to get part of your hard earned money out of them from yard sales, ebay postings etc.

There will be ill feeling in wonderful marriages so if you CAN don't try to throw out your spouses stuff, not if you want to stay with the baritones in the choir.

You can't move chemicals or booze. Throw one out and drink the other.
Don't get them confused.

Do NOT bring more than a couple REALLY fancy outfits. You will still be asked to weddings and funerals, keep that in mind...but if you bring the kind of clothes that you wear out to dinner THERE, people will know you are just off the airplane...here.

You aren't going to cut your grass, so leave the mower behind, but you may need a rake, and a few garden tools, IF you like to garden.

There will be absolutely some things that are irrational to bring. We all brought them. They are now in the back room at Bargains and Treasures.
Example? Lava Lamp.

Be aware that this is REAL stress you are going through. I used terrible language to my beloved Sweetie. When you arrive you may be just a little emotionally frazzled. Don't make major changes to your home right away and don't feel like it all has to be done in three months. We aren't any of us as young as we once were. Be nice to yourselves. Deep breaths.

I am sure other posters will give you a lot of good advice.

Keep your eye on the prize. You get to live here with all of us crazy people who just LOVE it.

[gregntam]

As I am sitting here taking a break, trying to cool down from packing up our belongings, I say to you....get rid of it all! Good luck! See you all very soon!

[frostola]

Well said Graciegirl! I thought I could never get rid of "stuff" but once I started it feels great!

[Midvale]

It is more difficult to downsize the longer you've lived in a place but a rewarding feeling once you've down it.

But I DID keep my Lava Lamp...

[Yorio]

Thanks, Gracie and others for your advice. Just resting after an hour of shredding documents that are quite old but needs to be shredded. Two more weeks to D-day. A couple of my friends also offered similar advice. Both of them said Give Away, Throw Away, Donate Away and once you do that you won't regret that you don't have them any more. My major problem was with LPs, CDs and books. I got rid of hundreds of CDs for about a quarter to fifty cents each to a retail store. They just came and took four boxes filled with CDs at $60 a box. Once it's gone, I guess I am o.k. with it. At least I have all the songs are stored in my I-Pod. LPs, they were selective so I still have hundreds of LPs left which will go to United Christian Ministry. Many of the LPs, I also was able to load the songs to my I-Pod. Books are another matter. I gave most of it away to a church for their Christmas book sales and also to a library. As I love to read and they are mostly non fictions, I just can't give any more away. This morning I went through a fourth run of selecting more books and selected about a half dozen again but,I still want to bring the rest Florida. I have read them once but my wife says will you read them again? To which I say ah...ah.... She thinks it's my identity associated with the books and she is right on. While I can't get rid of more books, she can't get rid of many dishes, cups etc. She can easily get rid of all the cook books she owned with ease. She did invite few friends and sold them dirt cheap but guess she is bringing the rest to Florida. It's strange since she graduated from entertaining and also mentioned that she will only cook when she feels like it. There is no way she is going to use all those dishes and cups etc. but I am not saying anything. You learn from experience. We also got rid of so many furnitures by selling them for a song or giving them away. I agree here that less clutter, the better. I also noticed that she has so many paintings in her collection. There is no way she can hang all the paintings she has. I jokingly said whether she is going to change art works like museums. I think that's her intent. Again, I am not saying anything. So the rumble continues.

[CFrance]

We used movers. They had a minimum amount that they charged, weight-wise. Which is why we brought our dining room set down even though we have one down here, to see which style fit better. Then we threw in a dresser and some kitchen bar stools. The rest were boxes. After giving away, selling, donating, we still have too much, but at least I know what we can keep after the new dining room buffet arrives and the kitchen people put more cabinets in the dinette area.

Some things I really, really wanted to bring down (mostly dishes and kitchen items, some decorative things) and knew we would be expanding our storage situation. I'm glad I didn't bite the whole bullet and have a bit of our old life down here with us.

[LvmyPug2]

I completely understand how hard it is to tackle years of accumulated "stuff". Kids, nieces/nephews got our family treasures and things that they didn't want helped many people at Goodwill and St Vincent de Paul. I was a bit surprised how some things that I thought would have great importance to family members actually had none. I had a few tears and many laughts...especially when I learned not one family member gave a hoot about an ugly pillow made by my grandmother that I had hung on to (out of a false sense of obligation) for 40 yrs.

Best advice I received was to give away and/or toss old photos. Those I wanted to keep, I took photos of the photos (better than scanning) and I saved them as a digital scrapbook. I eliminated about a dozen boxes of photos this way. Good luck and welcome to TV!

[buzzy]

Congratulations on the sale. (but, I heard about it at Mallory last night)

[vorage]

Keep the things you absolutely love and will use no matter where you are. Seriously edit the rest. We've been snowbirds for several years, but have just sold the place in Oregon. Right now I am sitting at our laptop on a card table in our empty living room. We will spend the next couple nights on the last piece of furniture in the house - sofa bed that Salvation Army will pick up on Friday. We are keeping a storage unit here for holiday and summer trips, so we are able to store some things, but we really edited. Huge Garage Sale. We took all our books to a used book store and what they didn't buy, we donated elsewhere. Family took whatever they wanted and I am grateful that many family items that we enjoyed for so many years have new caretakers that are happy to have their turn at custody. (Thankfully my sister wanted our aunt's smelly old muskrat coat that I had been shuffling around for years! yay!) It's really cathartic to do this kind of purging. There may be things we'll miss, but we can either replace them or visit them in their new home. This time next year, you'll be settled in nicely. Our very best to you both!

[pooh]

Oh, it is indeed stressful, but do recognize that we all survived and you will, too.
We spend time trying to figure out what to bring, where to put it, is this an important item in our lives, should we save this for the kids, etc, etc, etc.
We had movers and before they packed up our stuff, we purged. Many things went to neighbors or family or charity and still we brought lots of stuff. At this point, we have very little of the furniture we moved here. Over 7 years things have changed, we have changed. If you have any doubts about bringing anything, don't bring it. Your new home is different from the one you're in and chances are you will have so many more activities to keep you busy. Why should taking care of more than you need be more important than doing things you might want to do....sports, clubs, volunteering, working if you so desire.

When you arrive, take your time getting set up. Do the kitchen and your master suite. Those rooms are important...you need to eat and you do need to sleep.... Drive around, meet your neighbors, drive to some of the nearby towns. Realize that you make your own schedule, don't pass on an opportunity to spend time with new friends....have fun! Things will get done, eventually.... Many of us still have boxes in the attic and one of these days....

[gomoho]

So in 2001 we retired and sold almost everything we owned to travel full time in our motorhome. There are a few things we kept and I still cherish them to this day. There are a few things I didn't keep and wish I had. We have now refurnished from the ground up 3 homes since this experience. Each time there was one thing or the other we kept, but for the most part things were sold with the home. So we are now in The Villages, apparently living as minimalists, because an old friend recently visited and said, "but where is all your stuff"? Mission accomplished.

[Yorio]

As Gracie said, what both of us are going through are real stress. I have coated stint in one of my artery so hope I can survive this stress. However for those future movers who are overweight and never had heart problem, I would say be careful. If you are type A, be careful too. After we signed the contract four weeks ago, we were literally numb for a few days and we were definitely in denial. We knew the clocks were ticking but we didn't know where to start. After the third day, I decided to wake up at 6 instead of 8 and started sort of a schedule until D-day. One thing that helped us was that we had already planned few days at the beach with our son's family. This diversion helped us also in tackling the move when we came back. You may need a diversion if you hadn't planned any. One other lucky event which transpired was that we could put the house on the market as is. Since we thought we needed to paint corridors, take out carpets and stage the house, we were elated. I guess this was possible because the house inventory was very low in our area. Also, now that we are half way through, I do believe the first bite is the best bite. The longer your house is on the market, negotiations become more harder I am told. Since we didn't want to move this quickly, we contemplated not taking the counter offer or after the inspector's visit, to refuse any further improvements. In 20/20 hindsight, we are glad we did compromise. The albatross will eventually be off our necks.

[T-325]

It took me 6 months to downsize by 75%. My poor wife... she was tormented as I threw things out from our 28 years together. Once we closed on the house and moved into an apartment things have settled down quite nicely. We are still 3 - 5 years away from retirement..planning on a LSV in November. Things are great and when we buy in TV it will likely be a bigger space then we are currrently in.

In the rearview mirror... things will be fine