[angiefox10]

Originally Posted by Carl in Tampa

Well, yes, I think that is precisely what red witch was saying.

Quote: "If someone says something you disagree with, you thank them for their opinion and keep your negative thoughts to yourself?"

I don't think she is going to get a consensus on this proposal.

But, who knows? It isn't January yet...........

You may be right.... Thank you for your opinion... *smile*

[anarick]

Who are we kidding? People are going to say or write what they want when they want without any regard to how the reader feels. There are those that get their kicks in belittling others and this forum is their hunting ground. All forums are open and their is no filter to prevent the hunters from attacking. If we stop voicing our true opinions the hunters win. We should continue writing and expressing ourselves as we see fit.
H.G. Wells once wrote quote I write as straight as I can, just as I walk as straight as I can, because that is the best way to get there unquote.
Keep stroking

[redwitch]

I think Angie "got" what I meant and I think several others did as well. You can disagree with someone without getting nasty about it. You don't have to call someone a name or be so sarcastic that you may as well have called the person a fool or an idiot. You certainly don't have to call someone a liar (or imply they are) when they say something has happened (at least not until you have personally checked for facts and found the person to in fact be a liar and a troll).

I'm simply asking for a month of being respectful to each other, to not doubt everything said by a newbie, to correct something misspoken nicely, to not whine when something is not perfect, to agree to disagree without namecalling. Basically, just be nice for 31 days. Whether anyone else does it or not, I know I am going to try.

[eweissenbach]

Originally Posted by redwitch

I think Angie "got" what I meant and I think several others did as well. You can disagree with someone without getting nasty about it. You don't have to call someone a name or be so sarcastic that you may as well have called the person a fool or an idiot. You certainly don't have to call someone a liar (or imply they are) when they say something has happened (at least not until you have personally checked for facts and found the person to in fact be a liar and a troll).

I'm simply asking for a month of being respectful to each other, to not doubt everything said by a newbie, to correct something misspoken nicely, to not whine when something is not perfect, to agree to disagree without namecalling. Basically, just be nice for 31 days. Whether anyone else does it or not, I know I am going to try.

I agree Red. Disagreement need not be disagreeable, dissent need not be personal, differences of opinion need not be contentious. We can all use a little work on diplomacy in posting. Maybe thinking about how we frame our replies for a month would lead to better long-term understanding.

[CFrance]

Originally Posted by eweissenbach

The answer should be........

"I am positive that you are an idiot, and I mean that in the kindest possible way!"

Okay, make that three buttons... "Like," "Dislike," and "That Was Hysterical."

[njbchbum]

Bless you, redwitch! Your heart sure is in the right place! But we are a community of opinions and some express themselves with forthrightness and honesty and are quite blunt in doing so...while others here cannot accept forthrightness, honesty and someone being blunt. It will be interesting to see how this social experiment turns out...and how many posts are deleted by the mods and how many complaints are still made to the administrator.

[asianthree]

i think saying what we feel about the post is great, but to bash another poster if more what red is looking for...and there seems to more than usual..but just my thoughts

[CarolSells]

Well, not to hijack the thread but I vote that the moderator not be allowed to delete inappropriate posts and responses until I personally have had a chance to to read, review, and gasp! I hate it when I leave you kids alone for a little while, a cat fight ensues, and all that's left is deleted lines. Sheesh!

[George Bieniaszek]

Truly an excellent post!! Maybe that would be a great New Year's Resolution for those searching for the perfect resolution!!

Who knows, maybe positive thoughts and posts may catch on and continue thru February as well!!!

[Abby10]

Since I was the one who initiated the pesticide concern that FOODCRITIC references in post #36, I feel compelled to weigh in here. Even though I would be considered a "newbie" as far as posting, I have been lurking on this site for so many years that I actually feel I "know" many of you, if that makes any sense. By being allowed to express yourself in a back and forth dialogue on this forum enables us to get to know the personalities of one another. If all we were allowed to do was to respond as "yes" men/women, so to speak, and not be allowed to disagree about something, it would not enable us to get to "know" one another very well. Personally, I would have been very disappointed to have had only agreeable posts on my pesticide question (there probably would have been NO posts - HA!) I really wanted honest feedback both ways, since education and thought provoking conversation was what I desired. And although it could have been a very inflammatory post, I feel that most of the responses were caring and informational, with a few welcomes to come on down and join you all, despite the post. I do understand REDWITCH'S concern in regards to HOW sometimes people express themselves, be it condescending or downright hurtful sometimes, but if there was really someone who ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way or upset me too much to read their posts, I would just use the delete/hide option so I never see their posts. Personally, it would take a lot for me to do that though as I like differing opinions - IMHO, that's how you learn and grow.

[shcisamax]

Originally Posted by Abby10

I really wanted honest feedback both ways, since education and thought provoking conversation was what I desired.

We all look for honest feedback. I think what Redwitch is saying is there is no reason for derogatory or hurtful language.

[Abby10]

Totally agree, shcisamax.......derogatory or hurtful language adds absolutely nothing to a good conversation.

[CFrance]

Originally Posted by Abby10

Since I was the one who initiated the pesticide concern that FOODCRITIC references in post #36, I feel compelled to weigh in here. Even though I would be considered a "newbie" as far as posting, I have been lurking on this site for so many years that I actually feel I "know" many of you, if that makes any sense. By being allowed to express yourself in a back and forth dialogue on this forum enables us to get to know the personalities of one another. If all we were allowed to do was to respond as "yes" men/women, so to speak, and not be allowed to disagree about something, it would not enable us to get to "know" one another very well. Personally, I would have been very disappointed to have had only agreeable posts on my pesticide question (there probably would have been NO posts - HA!) I really wanted honest feedback both ways, since education and thought provoking conversation was what I desired. And although it could have been a very inflammatory post, I feel that most of the responses were caring and informational, with a few welcomes to come on down and join you all, despite the post. I do understand REDWITCH'S concern in regards to HOW sometimes people express themselves, be it condescending or downright hurtful sometimes, but if there was really someone who ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way or upset me too much to read their posts, I would just use the delete/hide option so I never see their posts. Personally, it would take a lot for me to do that though as I like differing opinions - IMHO, that's how you learn and grow.

Good thoughts, Abby10. The moderator will take care of the truly offensive posters, and if some others are a little "edgy," that's what makes it interesting to me. If everyone just passed, rather than express disagreement (even strongly) with a poster, we wouldn't get anywhere, and the forum would become boring.

I appreciate Redwitch's sentiment, but I feel that most of the posters are polite and/or humorous. They're not going to change and become mean. Most of the posters are not going to accuse others of being liars. And as for the negative/sarcastic/mean posters? They're not going to change anyway! Let the Mod have at them.

[njbchbum]

Originally Posted by shcisamax

We all look for honest feedback.
snipped

That is true, shcisamax - but - what some people post as their 'honest' feelings/opinion...others interpret as harsh, mean, cruel and then file a complaint with the site admin. Is the former a brute; is the latter overly sensitive? Sometimes there is no way to determine if what we post is going to hit someome the wrong way.

[Barefoot]

Originally Posted by CarolSells

Well, not to hijack the thread but I vote that the moderator not be allowed to delete inappropriate posts and responses until I personally have had a chance to to read, review, and gasp! I hate it when I leave you kids alone for a little while, a cat fight ensues, and all that's left is deleted lines. Sheesh!

When I leave for a while and come back to see ten deleted posts, it always makes me wonder what has been going on, and who's been sent to the principal's office.