[La lamy]

Originally Posted by cswett5234

My parents live in TV, they are in their mid-80’s, both are starting to have health issues, step-dad had his prostate removed, Mom has always had minor bouts of skin cancer and heart issues. It’s tough to discuss issues because you don’t want to appear particularly “ghoulish” or like you’re just after their money (we have plenty of our own).

Last time we visited (and after a few drinks) I asked Mom if she would stay in TV if Dad passed first or would she want to move back to Maine to be closer me and my sister. She said she would STAY in TV, said she enjoyed the place and enjoyed the neighbors, knew her way around, etc…

The questions we have are:
1. What are your plans if your spouse passes first? Stay or leave? Go to an assisted living facility? Do you have monies for such a move?
2. Do you have a list of assets? Bank accounts, where they’re located, any outstanding loans?
3. Do you have a will? Do Not Resuscitate orders written down anywhere?
4. Burial or cremation? Do you have a cemetery plot purchased or have a place in mind?
5. Do you have a list of all utility providers? Cell phone bill, electric/water/gas bills, home/auto insurance company, Netflix, Cable service….access to these accounts so they can be terminated.

These are the questions I would love to ask my folks, but can’t. Seniors of TV, how would you respond to your children asking these questions? Be honest.

I would prefer being the one to offer up those details to a child, but can see how it'd be difficult for a child to manage a passing if a parent never prepared them ahead for this. Tough call. Maybe ask in general terms if a power of attorney has ever been thought about in case of severe illness. Depending on the response, maybe a more thorough conversation could be had.

[La lamy]

Originally Posted by Whitley

What is the best exercise to keep the joints moving. I have some missing parts (lung lobe and others) and want to be sure I will be independent when I am 90. Yoga? Bike Riding?

I've heard walking is the best! But if you can do various exercises that you like, that's probably the best way to stay motivated.

[Happydaz]

Originally Posted by MartinSE

So true, and good luck with your treatment options. I wish you well.

What prompted me to start this thread was I recently my annual abdominal CT scan to check on the status of an AAA repair (Abdominal Aorta aneurysm). While reading the Scan, the technical noticed a nodule on my right lung lobe that wasn't there last years, so my PCP ordered a full chest CT for tomorrow.

We don't know what it is yet, so I am just treading water. But, with 45 years worth of dues paid into the I have cancer club (two packs of Pall Mall non filters a day), I think it is about time I was accepted.

My wife and I have been discussing possible paths forward, and I am not interested in any treatment that does not have a good probability of recovering my current quality of life. So, if it is Cancer, and if it is going to reek havoc on my life, I would rather just start palliative care... that is my preferences, and only apply to me, I respect you for fighting back and wish you all the world of luck and good fortune.

I certainly hope that things work out for you. I now see the seriousness of your post. There are many new treatment options available today so if you need to go down that path you may find effective therapy with tolerable side effects. Keep the faith. I am sure all who have posted here or are reading your posts are thinking about you and wishing you the best.