[taylor111947]

I was very glad to see this thread. I’m looking at a number of retirement communities and one of the reasons TV is at the top of my list is because of these forums. I feel as if it gives me an idea of what it’s like to live in TV.
However, I have been disappointed to see that many times when a poster has a negative comment the responding attitude seems to be “that’s never been my experience so it must not be true” – although not in those words and that might not have been the intent. The idea that posters are intimidated into not posting negative comments reflects poorly on the community.
I realize that to think that life in TV is perfect and that everyone is happy would be unrealistic. In some ways it’s more important for me to understand the things people don’t like about TV than it is to understand the things that people like. I feel as if I can make a more informed decision.
So, I hope people will continue to post about the good, the bad and the ugly without worrying about what others will say.

[champion6]

Well said, Taylor111947.

[springfield]

When I posted the event about our car, it was just a statement about what happened. We found it slightly amusing that someone felt the need to remove what did not belong to them. From some of the responses to this thread, I am a bit disturbed that someone would think that I was "stirring up trouble" just because we were new. I agree with the beginning thread that sometimes a person's viewpoint is marginalized. We can disagree but hopefully with respect. I no longer bother to look at any of the political "discussions" because they are filled with personal attacks.

I agree with some of you that at times we say things because it is not face to face. Gracie Girl inviting us to her home,helped us realize that these are real humans with feelings, and individual life experiences.

[Taj44]

Good points, especially the need for respect. And thanks to Taylor who was saying basically the same thing. I too have been disturbed by the rush to judgement from those that immediately think "its the competition" or somone is "stirring up trouble", simply because they voice an experience or point of view that differs from another person's experience/perspective. In most cases, it just isn't so.

[K9-Lovers]

Originally Posted by taylor111947

. . .I have been disappointed to see that many times when a poster has a negative comment the responding attitude seems to be “that’s never been my experience so it must not be true” – although not in those words and that might not have been the intent. The idea that posters are intimidated into not posting negative comments reflects poorly on the community.
I realize that to think that life in TV is perfect and that everyone is happy would be unrealistic. . . . So, I hope people will continue to post about the good, the bad and the ugly without worrying about what others will say.

Well said, Taylor. You've captured my sentiments with the above statements.

[Ajack]

Originally Posted by Taj44

Good points, especially the need for respect. And thanks to Taylor who was saying basically the same thing. I too have been disturbed by the rush to judgement from those that immediately think "its the competition" or somone is "stirring up trouble", simply because they voice an experience or point of view that differs from another person's experience/perspective. In most cases, it just isn't so.

I believe that most of the "doubters" concerns posters with very few posts. I think it is very rude and uncordial-like for new members to come here and immediately complain.
I compare coming to a forum as the same thing as moving to a new neighborhood. I would like to know my neighbors and be friends before I started "ranking" down the whole neighborhood.

Now, of course, I am a new member here, but I am a member of several forums and have thousands of posts in the last 7 years. Most forums are the same. They will take new members with a grain of salt before they can "trust" what they say. It is the same in real life, too, don't cha think?

[graciegirl]

I agree Taylor, particularly the good, the bad and the ugly.

Some folks rarely post anything about bad.

Some folks rarely post anything about good.

And some folks are just...

Nope, ain't gonna say that.

[Pturner]

I agree that a poster should not be marginalized for relating a negative experience and agree that such posts are helpful. I think though that we sometimes read too much into a response of a different color/ perspective.

Sometimes, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there," just means, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there." It doesn't mean, "I don't believe you" or "no one should believe you". Often, the intent isn't to marginalize the initial poster or to discount another poster or posters' experiences, but to let TOTV readers know that bad experiences from a particular vendor are not necessarily par for the course. When someone posts either a positive or negative experience with a particular vendor, I appreciate learning whether the experiences of others were similar.

Take for example a particular plumber. I think virtually 100 percent of posters who have used him have reported negative experiences. No way would I use him. Havana. More negative than positive posts. I might try it, but not with first-time out of town guests. Cane Gardens. A few negative experiences related but more positives than negatives and positive experiences myself. I'll go back. Glenview. Positive experiences myself, but several reports of negative ones. If I have a negative experience, I am more likely to speak to manager rather than chalking it up to just one bad deviation from norm.

The posts about negative experiences were helpful. The posts about positive experiences at the same establishment were helpful. Neither marginalizes the other. I just see more of the canvass.

Am I wrong?

[Taj44]

Originally Posted by Ajack

I believe that most of the "doubters" concerns posters with very few posts. I think it is very rude and uncordial-like for new members to come here and immediately complain.
I compare coming to a forum as the same thing as moving to a new neighborhood. I would like to know my neighbors and be friends before I started "ranking" down the whole neighborhood.

Now, of course, I am a new member here, but I am a member of several forums and have thousands of posts in the last 7 years. Most forums are the same. They will take new members with a grain of salt before they can "trust" what they say. It is the same in real life, too, don't cha think?

I agree. However, in the particular case of the rats at the Ashland pool, which I mentioned, our neighbor had many many posts, so she was not a newcomer. I do think there is a group of people who somehow take it personally if their neighborhood, The Villages, is found to be imperfect in any way, and will criticize anyone who mentions these imperfections. And there are others, I think, who may be connected with The Villages developer, who are trying to put The Villages in the best possible light, who will try to cast doubt on some posters. So I do agree that we need to keep all of this in perspective, and take with a grain of salt, as it were.

[graciegirl]

Originally Posted by Pturner

I agree that a poster should not be marginalized for relating a negative experience and agree that such posts are helpful. I think though that we sometimes read too much into a response of a different color/ perspective.

Sometimes, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there," just means, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there." It doesn't mean, "I don't believe you" or "no one should believe you". Often, the intent isn't to marginalize the initial poster or to discount another poster or posters' experiences, but to let TOTV readers know that bad experiences from a particular vendor are not necessarily par for the course. When someone posts either a positive or negative experience with a particular vendor, I appreciate learning whether the experiences of others were similar.

Take for example a particular plumber. I think virtually 100 percent of posters who have used him have reported negative experiences. No way would I use him. Havana. More negative than positive posts. I might try it, but not with first-time out of town guests. Cane Gardens. A few negative experiences related but more positives than negatives and positive experiences myself. I'll go back. Glenview. Positive experiences myself, but several reports of negative ones. If I have a negative experience, I am more likely to speak to manager rather than chalking it up to just one bad deviation from norm.

The posts about negative experiences were helpful. The posts about positive experiences at the same establishment were helpful. Neither marginalizes the other. I just see more of the canvass.

Am I wrong?

PTurner. It seems to me that you always are the voice of reason.

[tpop1]

Originally Posted by Pturner

Sometimes, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there," just means, "I'm surprised; we've always had a great experience there." It doesn't mean, "I don't believe you" or "no one should believe you".

The posts about positive experiences at the same establishment were helpful. Neither marginalizes the other. I just see more of the canvass.

Am I wrong?

Some of the posts on the Glenview thread were helpful but others went well beyond "I'm surprised" & were denegrating. Some of these were the reason for this thread! For example:

"We have NEVER experienced any of the issues described! ...... If I asked, I'm sure I could get a whole lemon. Of course, we treat our Servers courteously and Tip well. Got to be more to this than meets the eye!"

"It never ceases to amaze how people get so lost in second hand gossip, rendering them incapable of independant thought or experience."

"I also think this is a personal issue with the original post. .......... AND we always tip 20% and more. Gee, maybe that's why we have such good service, Ya think?................."

"How true as some just can't stand to tell the true "facts" of an incident and are apt to embellish second hand info. Jmho"

[Russ_Boston]

Enough about how some reacted to the rats. That was over TWO years ago. We've all written things that we look back on with questions as to why we said that. Let's move on with lessons learned.

[Ajack]

Originally Posted by Russ_Boston

Enough about how some reacted to the rats. That was over TWO years ago. We've all written things that we look back on with questions as to why we said that. Let's move on with lessons learned.

I AGREE ( What happened to my little "I agree" animation?)

[Bill-n-Brillo]

ajack - Here it is

Bill

[Ajack]

Originally Posted by Bill-n-Brillo

ajack - Here it is

Bill

Oh, You had him.